I'm Just a Broadway Baby

plumbing

2006-03-04T13:43:00.001-08:00

Froggie...I'm sorry that you couldn't comment on the other blog...I''l just have to carbon copy everything and set it up here so you can comment :) I guess I didn't realize you had to have an account to comment...what's the world coming to?

I've really got nothing new on the home front...other than Granny is getting moved out of ICU today (hopefully...)

Cody and I are planning to set up one of our bedrooms today...and he's doing the plumbing in our house, which to me, says disaster...but I'm trying to be supportive...pray for us :)

We're spreading grass seed on the front yard, and I got a new pair of flip flops...

Cody just called me into the bathroom to show me that he could tunr the water off in the shower with the knobs...and he can't yet...I'm really toying with calling a plumber.

we wanted to be moved in already, but things just haven't been going as well as we would have liked, and we lost some days because of sitting at the hospital...which is never fun.

I should go before he floods the house

plumbing

2006-03-04T13:43:00.000-08:00

: )

2006-02-28T09:46:00.000-08:00

so...I know it's been for freaking ever since I've posted...I know...I know...I know...but I've been lost in the endless abyss of dial up, and it's been simpley awful! But there is a light at the end of the tunnel...tonight between the hours of five pm and seven pm Cox is coming to my new house and hooking up cable!! I'm so excited!! No more antena!! I don't have to watch Divorce Court and Montel, and Sesame Street any more!! I can watch the History Channel, and Food TV, and HGTV, and The Discovery Channel,not to mention getting to be on the internet without getting frustrated, and phew...I need to calm down, I'm getting a little over excited... :)

The house is pretty much ready to move in to. I'm really excited about that. I'll be sending emails to the necessary people to get my new address out there so people can send me mail (but with cable internet, I don't know WHO would waste the 39 cents on a stamp...)

The floors are laid, we have our new furnature, and next weekend I get my new bed... the sinks are cut out and one of them even works :) the toilet is hooked up and apparently works (I have to admit, I'm not quite brave enough to try it yet...) all that we need as far as plumbing goes is for Cody to finish hooking up the kitchen sink, and we need a tun faucett and shower head. I'm going over there in a little while to clean up and set up the kitchen and finish cleaning up the bathroom...there's grit in the bathtub that needs to be cleaned and there's sawdust all over the place from when Cody and my dad cut out the batheroom sink. Cody hooked up my stove last night, and we're waiting on my grandma to get her new fridge so we can move over her old one (she gave it to me for my last birthday), then the only thing missing from the kitchen is the dishwasher. my other grandma is giving us her washer and dryer, she won't need them you see, because she's moving in with my mom and dad. Which we're all really excited about, since we never really got to see her growing up, she lived in Texas, and after I overheard my grandpa bad mouthing my mother, I didn't go see them at all...I was lucky enough to make up with my grandpa before he died. It was a rather difficult situation... but in the end, it all worked out. so we should be getting the washer and dryer in the next few weeks.

Hopefully tonight Cody and I will start putting rooms together. The livingroom is almost done. Our new furniture got here a week or so ago. It's red leather :) it's like a deep red, almost maroon. It goes great with the natural wood floors. I can't wait for us to have some out of town guests (couch FROGGIE Cough) :0)

anyway...I will be on more regularly after tonight. Cody and I are going to be busy wiring the house and getting stuff unpacked tonight, so I'll be on tomorrow for sure :)

a little of this, a little of that

2005-12-12T20:09:00.000-08:00

well, we're making progress on the house. last night our new neighbor Mike came and blew texture on the remaining walls in the living room and guest bedroom. We just have the hall left, but we can't do it yet because there was two door to the furnace, one that we will use and one that was just useless... when the door is opened, you get a nice view of the side of the furnace, but no way to get to it to do repairs or anything, so we ripped the door out and took off all the trim, and as soon as we get a piece of sheet rock in and taped and bedded, we can texture that and then paint the whole house.

I went and picked out the counter top for my cabinets today. They should be installed by the end of the week, or the beginning of next week. And I made a phone call to my cousin Jim The Roofer who is going to come out and inspect the roof tomorrow (he actually might have come out today while I was at work, but I didn't see a note from him, so I don't know...)

as soon as the cabinets are installed, we'll put the new flooring down in the kitchen, dining room, and living room (wood laminate) then we'll get the flooring for the hall, bathroom and two bedrooms.

We're doing a theme in each room, so my creative juices are really flowing. I'm excited, and can't wait to get decorating...

in other news, I'm auditioning for a show next month. Rose state college is putting on the musical Narnia. Kinda convienient since the MOVIE just came out... but I really don't care, it's a show, and I haven't done a show in over a year.

I have to have two contrasting show songs prepared, so I'm taking suggestions. The audition is on Jan 12, call backs are the 13th. More on that as it unfolds.

I'm ready for Christmas. I've got all Cody's presants wrapped and under the tree...and every night I hear myself asking him if we can open our presants to eachother... I don't really care if I get to open any or not, but I really want him to open the ones I got him. I got him quite a few presants this year... but most of them are relativly small... some cologne, a hat, an electric razor, an atari flashback, and some Magentix (my cousin Brent got some for his birthday and I can't keep Cody from playing with them, so I just decided that he needed some for Christmas).

tonight was my last night of work until after Christmas, and my last day of school is on Wednesday. I'm trying to decide if I want to register as a music major again, or as a theatre major.... I'm really wrestling with it... I'll let you know what I decide.

I'm getting really tired, and it's really cold at my grandma's...and I'm finding typing getting harder and harder...I'll try to blog again tomorrow :)

ahem...

2005-12-06T11:40:00.000-08:00

ok, alright...I'm sorry it's been over a month since I've blogged, but from the lack of comments, I guess no one minds that I took a month off... I do have a feeling that Froggie would have comented had I not called her...

but not to worry, I will have interent tonight/tomorrow.

There has been a lot going on. just to fill all in...I told you all that we got a dog right? well, we now have a cat too...she's totally black, and she's a bundle of energy. We're open to suggestions on what to name her... so far we've tossed around Sweet Pea, 12 pack (she likes to play in empty soda boxes) and No. :)

We've bought the house next door to my granny's, and we're spending most of our evenings working on it. We've got texture on one wall and we've started texturing two other walls. It's really cold here (no snow yet, but if your nose is running, beware of snotsicles...)
so it's kind of slow going. The house doesn't have power yet, and we're working after Cody gets off work so it's in the dark... we've got extension cords snaked across my grandma's yard so we can have light. I'm very excited about getting it completed. When it's done, I really want my first guests to be Froggie and Mr. O, so plan a trip down :)

I texted C-bear yesterday, but I haven't heard back from her...I think I might have freaked her out...lemme explain. I don't know why, but the other night, I dreamed about you... see, I was going to vist you, and you lived in a really big ominous looking house, which as it turns out was haunted... and Gina from good old CCC was angry at the two of us for something or other...it might have been liquor related... :) and she was trying to murder us...we came through alright, but I woke up thinking "that was SO bizzare..."

I went to see a Tuna Christmas on Sunday compliments of my wonderful Granny. if any of you have the chance to go see it, you really should. any of the Tuna plays are well worth the time and money. I guess I better tell you a little bit about them...The plays (there are three "A Greater Tuna, A Tuna Chirstmas, and Red White and Tuna"
and they center around the third smallest town in Texas, Tuna. The characters are played by two men. I think at last count, they played 27 characters, even women. They are all comedies, and are all really good. So good that my grandmother (who is not really into theater) loves them enough to own all the available videos. you all should google it. :)

I will be in NE over new years, so hopefully I can catch up with a few buddies if the mother in law doesn't go off the deep end again. She's planning on doing thier family's Christmas while we're there...so, I can't promise anything, but I would love to try to catch up with everyone.

I would like to thank everyone for the calls/texts on my birthday. It meant a lot to know that you guys remembered :)

love you all. I've got to jet right now though, so I hope to catch all of you later :)

The joys of being married...

2005-11-01T07:35:00.000-08:00

Got back about 9:30 last night...Actually we got into town around 8 but we had to stop at my granny's to pick up our food (I did tell everyone about the angel food network right?) then we had to drop off my new puppy at my aunt's house, where he will be spending a couple of months until we can get out of this roach infested apartment. Anyway...Back to the puppy. He's a lab mix...I think he's mixed with blue healer, but heck if I know...All I know is that he's simply adorable and my heartless battle axe of a mother in law was going to shoot him...So I brought him home with me. His name is Wedge, after Wedge Antilles in the Star Wars Trilogy. I really like the star wars movies, but they are really a part of who Cody is.... I let Cody name him because he let me bring him home. And some how, Wedge just fits him.

It was almost an uneventful trip...But then Kitty and I fought... It's a long story so I'll try to shorten it the best I can...Cody had been complaining that a favorite shirt of his was getting too tight around the middle... He tried (and failed) to blame it on me, and it became the subject of much teasing and poking fun. Well, while we were up there we were eating lunch and Cody was REALLY hungry having not eaten all day. He had a sandwich, some of Kitty's culinary creations, such as "army food, and tuna noodle casserole" and two pieces of Montana's birthday cake...I pointed out to him (all in good fun mind you) that it was obvious that HE was the cause of the growing gut...And that was that. We had a good laugh. Later that night we (Cody and I) went to see Froggie and Mr. O, we had a very yummy dinner and watched a movie, caught up on what was going on in our lives, and when we got back to Kitty's Megan (my sister in law) was up in our bedroom and said that her mother was really talking a lot of shit behind my back...just out of curiosity I asked what she said. Megan told me that Kitty said I was a lousy wife for making fun of Cody, that if I could cook he wouldn't be pigging out at her house, and my house keeping skills were next to nothing, that Cody deserved someone who would treat him the way he was supposed to be treated...And that something had to be wrong with me because I haven't given him a son yet... (those of you who REALLY know me, know that comment was WAY out of line and a lot below the belt)

so the next morning, I went down stairs, and as calmly as I could told her that if she had a problem with me she should tell me about it, not go talking to people behind my back...I then informed her of the past miscarriages I had and told her she could go straight to hell...And well...Things escalated....And we left. I'm hoping to talk to her and apologize for the nasty things I said...But I don't see it happening any time soon. And even still, I still have to tell her what a lousy mother she is to make Megan babysat all the time while she goes out and gets drunk and pregnant again... sheesh...I really need to find it in me to forgive her for making the "give him a son" comments...But that really hurt me...

so...That really brings all up to date on my weekend...

oh yeah...The Sooners beat the Huskers on Saturday... :)

fall retreat

2005-10-23T19:37:00.000-07:00

well, this weekend was one big adventure...it was the fall retreat with the youth group of my church, and we decided to break from the norm. we usually go to Falls' Creek Baptist Convention for a weekend but this year, we opted for something alittle less pricey...so we went to Bridgeview Resort on Lake Texoma just outside of Madill, OK. (that's right... Ma- Dill like Pickles) the trip was supposed to take a little over 2 hours, we left the church at 7, stopped in Paul's Valley to eat then got back onto good old I 35 towards Ardmore. we got off at ardmore and headed on US70 toward Madill, went through madill took a wrong turn, got on the wrong hwy (we were supposed to be on US 199, and got on US 9( going the wrong way mind you...) we were supposed to be at camp around 10... after several stops, turn arounds and peeing in the dark at camp stops, we found someone who was sent to find us and lead us in...it was a little after one in the morning.

we get to camp and discover that it's not really the most savory of places...it looked pretty run down, but at this point none of us cared...it was late and we were cold and tired. there were three youth girls and two youth sponsors (Sandy and I) sandy was at one end of the room, the girls pushed all the beds together and I took the other end of the triple king sized bed that they had created for us.

You would really have to know these girls to find this as funny as I did...but I'm going to try to explain it to you anyway, just because I haven't blogged in a while, and I feel like it's a blog worthy tale. The girls are Brittany, Kelsey and Amanda (we call her Amanda Zanda so no to confuse her with me...but since I will not be reffering to myself in third person, except when quoting someone else, I'll just call her Amanda) Brittany is Sandy's oldest daughter and they have a great relationship. In all honesty I envy it, but that's a whole other blog... ANYWAY...

Brittany is well known for her bodily functions. She's not at all shy and open farts and is all too proud to announce what she has done. it may seem gross, but she's 18 and that's a part of her, and we have all accepted it, and that's that. well, she was the one that turned out the lights, so when she ran across the floor, she was worried about stepping on some of the wild life that may or may not have been on the floor and or under the bed, so she jumped onto the bed landing on her stomach... just at the moment she landed Sandy lets one go...it was LOUD. everyone automatically thought it was Brittany... and her denying it was very funny (especially at 2 in the morning...) so there's a lot of laughing going on...and I fall asleep...for those that don't know, I snore. and it's not easy to got to sleep by, I'm sure...so anyway, the girls are still talking and giggling and I start snoring and Amanda said in a whisper "Amanda's snoring" and I was told that I said right out loud "Yes, I am" and Kelsey whispered "shhh! she can hear you" I don't remember this event...

Before the Sun came up, Brittany had to get up and get ready to go back to OKC, she was going to pick up some more people and play in a soccer game, so she was getting ready to leave. She thought she left her alarm on so she came running back into the room where everyone was sleeping and tripped over a chair...I bolted up in bed (becauseI had been dreaming of raccoons and such in the cabin...) and asked if she was ok... I think I scared her as much as she scared me.

the next day there was much hanging out and laughing and homework ( I have a test tomorrow that I was studying for...) and music and eating, and football and soccer, and sitting by the lake...it was a good day.

the trip home was a LOT more uneventful than the trip down there...all we had was a messed up windshield wiper, and we happened to find an O'Reily's auto parts store...so that was taken care of...

we got back, and I took a shower. Cody fixed Chile and it was great. We watched Tombstone, then Santa Claus is Coming to Town, then we watched "it's the great pumpkin Charlie brown, followed by You're not elected Charlie Brown.... I have to say, I feel really bad for Charlie Brown...

other than that...noting really going on except my test tomorrow...which I don't really feel prepared for, so I"m going to read over my notes just ONE more time.

'Night Ya'll

Curious...very Curious

2005-10-17T06:37:00.000-07:00

with the exception of a stack of books laying on the office floor waiting for a bookshelf to move into, MY HOUSE IS CLEAN!!! yay me! we've been working on it for a few days and it looks good!

we spent our anniversary hanging out together. we didn't do anything we didn't want to do. :) we woke up a little later than usual yesterday morning, we played hookey from church, and went to wal-mart. then we decided to go out to lunch on the way to the State Fair Grounds, where there was a gun show, and (we didn't know this until we got there) an RV show. we checked out the RV show on our way to find the gun show. we got to the gun show about two hours before it was going to close...good for me, bad for Cody. He wanted to stay the whole day... now, I like guns, and knives and armour, but I can't say that I want to spend a whole day at a small scale gun show. We did buy a single shot 12 gage shot gun brand new for $65. Cody was happy...I could care less...I'm never gonna shoot it...too much kick for me.

Cody is looking into a couple different jobs, one is an Insurance Adjustor, and one is an Audio video tech at a comapny called faa, and it's making 17 an hour plus benfits and great hours (7-3 mon-fri)he's dropping his resume off today.

I just for out of my history class and we had to end early because a guy (Marcel) had what is believed to be a heart attack. Say a prayer for him will you? I'm pretty freaked out by it. How often do kids in college have heart attacks? He's a really nice guy that has a lot of energy and talkes about football with the other guys before class...he's really funny and just as sweet as he can be. I really hope things go well for him. I hope that it was just a small one that's easy to recover from. I'd hate to see his life cut short.

I'm just kind of hanging out waiting on maintenece to get here, there was apparently a clog in the shower drain that unclogged itself last night while the neighbors were taking an hour long shower... oh yeah...it sprung up through my shower drain in my bathroom in my bedroom...I thought it was going to flood the bathroom floor...but once all the dirt and hair and whatever else is mixed in with is was out of the pipe, the water receeded...it happend about 9:30 last night and we called the office and they said they called Maintence we called a grand total of three times and no one came to fix it, so we just left it, and I called this morning and talked to the real property manager and she said they would be here about 12 (which is normally when I get out of school...) I just have to wait around until then class was cut short today because of Marcel. It's really unsettling.

I need to go...more later if I have time

blog the blogging blogger

2005-10-14T18:44:00.000-07:00

I was going to blog last night, and I got about two paragraphs into it when I had to go start dinner and then Cody was home and then we were eating and everything else...so I did't get to finish...so i decided that I would do it this morning. I just got up...and the house is almost clean, and that makes me feel good inside...almost something worth celebrating...I'll tel you what else is worth celebrating...TODAY IS MY ONE YEAR WEDDING ANNIVERSARY! yep one year of mostly blissful marraige. I can't believe it. I mean I really can't belive it. It's gone by SO fast.

We're starting this new year in our marraige off a little differently. we're really going to buckle done and get our finances in order, and we're going save EVERYTHING we possilby can towards a new vehicle for me...because I'm tired of mine breaking down all the time. oh yeah...and we're really getting serious about paying off old debts and raising our credit score.

We've also found a program called Angle Food Network. It's area churches that help people buy food...well, let me rephrase that...you buy food from the church every month... you pay $25 and you get one of everything the chutch has to offer...you just have to place your "order" ahead of time so they can be sure that there's enough food. I'm going to try to do that today... Ijust have to borrow the $25 from my grandma since Cody forgot to leave me the money...

ok...I've got to go do some laundry...I'll blog again later if I can

fall as fallen

2005-10-08T15:17:00.000-07:00

phew...hey guys...I am just straight tired. and I really shouldn't be... I slept til 9:30 this morning. I saw cody off to work, and sat around playing Mario 3 on the nintindo. I've almost beaten the game three times today, but I had to quit...it was pretty stressful...I take it personally when Mario throws himself into the lava lake, or lets one of those mad looking mushrooms with feet bite him... it's just too much for me... so I turned it off and started making bread for dinner tonight.

I'm covered in flour... it's all over my clothes and in my hair...luckily I'm taking a shower soon. I just took my last loaf out of the oven. I made two round loaves and a regular loaf. I'm making homeade potatoe soup for dinner and I'm going to use the two round loaves as bowls to hold the soup...it smells SO good in my apartment. :)

I started cleaning up around the house. I've been busy today. Not terrbily busy, just busy enough.

Let me just give a shout out to Rob...welcome to the blog, I checked yours, just haven't had a chance to comment yet. I am also a teacher, so your site will be helpful I'm sure :) thanks!

Froggie...haven't heard anything from you in a while... everything alright?

C-bear...we need to chat...I was wondering if something I read in a recently past blog has happened... :)

we might be moving again...into a house this time...a two bed, one bath, house with hardwood floors and a great den area. it's going for $400 a month with the option to buy. It's in a decent neighborhood. it wouldn't be until January but it pays to plan for the future...

we're going to get on track finanically. On Thursday we're going to Consumer Credit Counselling Servie, and we're going to get our debts taken care of. and we're going to rebuild our credit...which will make me feel more secure about having a baby.

I've been seeing a specialist, and she says that my miscarraiges could be part psycological, and part stress related. She said that maybe if we get things on track and I quit worrying about things, we could really try and succeed.

They guy I took over for at the academy is coming back next week. there are 4 or 5 students of his that want me...so I will be working part time for the remainder of the semester (which ends the first week of December) then in the middle of January, when the next semester starts, I'll be back to a decent number of students.

Eco-Motus practices yesterday...I guess I should say 3/4 of Eco-Motus practiced yesterday... Boomer will not be playing with us next week. I am about fed up with this whole situation. I want to play. I want to play well. I want to get a following. I think I feel called to go back to my roots... back to country and bluegrass... that would be great...Chris (my guitar teacher) said he would be glad to play with me any time any where, but I want something a little more permanant. I want a band...finding a band that's not 100 years old that loves old counrty and blue grass will be hard. I was shot down on the "We're Five" concept...Luke said that he didn't have the time, and I don't want to audition people. I know he's good, and I know that Danielle was good, even though she was (still) too imature to take on the responsibility. I have really cool music...including As Rain (the real group's arrangement) God Only Knows (also the Real Group's arr.) I've got a really great arr. of Rubber Duckie, and numerous others. Open to advice on what to do...I know lots of great singers...we just don't live in the same state (cough FROGGIE cough...) excuse me...

ok..I have to go start the soup. I'll yak at you guys later on.

Holy Flaming Crap Balls!

2005-10-05T06:58:00.000-07:00

Cody had to go to work late yesterday, (ok, lets just clarify this for future refrence. when I say early I mean 8:30-5 and when I say late I mean 1-9.) and I had a voice lesson at 10. I really like my voice teacher. I haven't been able to say that in a very long time. She knows what she's talking about, she's still working (runs Sooner Opera, as well as does other shows...she's going to do Smokie Joe's Cafe in May) and she doesn't have a dry sense of humor. She's one of those Southern Black Methodist Women that have a frim faith, as well as a great arua about them. She's a treasure. anyway...we picked out music, she's letting me do the ONE song that I really wanted (I remember, by S. Sondhiem... you knew it was going to Sondheim something or other)and the others we picked out sort of together. she said how about this one, and I would say ok, or nah. I have to do 5 songs and two of them are for Jurries.

ok. I get home from my lesson, and we kinda chill out, and eat lunch. I start feeling queesey in the stomach, and I decide to lay down and rest before I go to work, so he leaves for work, and I'm resting watching TV, then it's time for me to go to my guitar lesson. I left a little early so I could find Chris' house ( I had never been there before, and he's moved his studio there) I get there, and we play a little on what we worked on last week, then he lets me play the Carvin (a gorgeous silver guitar with AMAZING sound) and he had pre-recorded CD of the 12 bar blues, and asked me to play lead over it, and I did and he recoreded it. The first time I started out great, but kind of fizzled out close to the end. I was losing all my energy, by this time I had a full blown headache that quickly turning into a migraine. The next time, I kinda shoved not feeling good out of my mind, and just had fun. There were a few wrong notes, but I'm not used to playing lead, so I thought for a begginer, it sounded pretty darn good. I left there and started on my way to work, that's when it went from bad to worse.

I was on the phone with Cody, and right when I hung up, the battery light came on, the power steering stopped working nad the AC quit. I was on the interstate, so I pulled off at the first exit I could. which I thought was Western Ave, but really it was Walker Ave. I was stressed out... I called Cody freaking out because I was already late for work...and he said that I would have to call someone to come get me, because he couldn't talk me through fixing it. SO I called Granny, and she didn't answer, so I tried to call work, and couldn't get ahold of anyone there either. I called Kacey but I knew she was with a student and wouldn't answer her phone...so I left a message...and I called my mom (bawling at this point) it may seem an odd choice to call my mom, we only get along every other month or so, and she's in Kansas, what could she do? but she also happens to be my insurance agent...and I thought I'd remembered her telling me that i had emergancy road side assisstance. which I did...and she told me the wrecker to call, and I did, and I was on my way home about 5:30. I broke down before 4:30, but having that time stranded gave me enough time to call my students. The wrecker got there and picked up my car. I rode back with him to my grandma's house, where Cody said he could fix it that night.

By this time I had a full blown migraine. I was in the back bedroom trying to go to sleep with my aunt's boyfriend (who is not out of jail but has to go to court to see how much time he has to spend in the federal penn because of the gun charges...)went to the parts store and got what he needed and fixed it. I got home and Cody had taken off a littl early because I was having such a shitty day...which was a nice suprise. I laid down around 8 and went to sleep. Cody came to bed around 11 (he was playing Mario 3 on the Nintendo) and I woke up. I was hungry, so he got me some crackers, and a pop, and then he went to sleep and I went back to sleep...woke up a few times... but over all, I felt a lot better.

I just got back from class. I found out that my first test I made a B. an 96 to be exact...as much as I hate history, I think congratulations are in order. :)

I've got to go pick up some music for my students in Norman, then I think I'm taking Brent to drum lessons. :)

junk

2005-10-04T10:23:00.000-07:00

yesterday was probably the longest day I've had in a long time. I went to school looking very cute (if I do say so myself...)then I came home and ate lunch. After lunch, Kacey called me and asked if I would be interested in playing a show on the 15th. well...that's my anniversary, so I told her I'd have to check with Cody and ask if would be ok. He agreed, then I bummed around a littl more and then it was time to go to work. Kacey came and picked me up, then after work, we went to the church to practice. Jared (our drummer...FOR NOW)was on his wasy up there, and we practiced until about 10:30. I got home around 11. It doesn't sound like a very long day, but if you consider that I was up and awake at 7 to get ready for school...that makes the day a little longer.

I'm writing this in notepad, and will cut and paste when I'm finished. I don't like notepad all that much...I can't figure out how to make it wrap around. I came make one line go on forever...and that's frustrating to me.

I've decided to let my bangs grow out to the rest of my hair's length. I've never not had bangs, so I think this will be a welcome change.

I'm not feeling very well today...I'm tired, and don't have time to take a nap, and I'm feeling a little queesey in the stomach.

I guess that's all I have for right now. I have to work tonight as well as take my own guitar lesson...

Kenny the guy that I took over for will be coming home on the 17th. It works out both good and bad for me...it's good because I'm not working quite so many hours, and it's bad because I'm losing the bulk of my talented students.

I'm thinking of opening my own studio here in MWC...thoughts on what to call it?

anyway, I'm done for now

ugh

2005-10-01T07:00:00.000-07:00

ok...this is going to be as short as possible without leaving out any of the facts... our internet was cut off so we decided to get a phone line (a 20 $ a month land line) so we could get dial up. Yeah...I know I said I'd never go back, but I just can't do without the internet right now. I've got what's called an Annotated Bibliography to work on for my history class... and I have to do most of my research on the internet until Cody fixes his stupuid truck... he's got my car again. So I"m here stranded with no way to get anywhere...and the guys that are re-roofing the apartment are creepy. They all look like ex cons or alcoholics... or both...

I think there's a rule that says I can't sleep past 8:45. I've been trying and trying and trying to sleep in to a decent time, I've even tried staying up later... but yeah...my body will have none of that, it's 8:30 or 8:45 and there's nothing I can say or do to make it react differently. it's frustrating really...there's only one day I week (two days every other week) that I can sleep in, and every day, I wake up as if I had to go to school. ARG!!!

ok..enough of that little soap box...I'm sorry it's been so long since I blogged...believe it or not,I really have meant to...I just get busy, or get tired, or whatever...

I saved all my church check for two months (well, for one month then my church paid me for a month when the secretay lost the checks...so I had two months worth of checks) that we went and cashed. Then we went to the store and bought food....I thought that was kind of important... I gave Cody some money for Gas, and the ret is mine to do with what I will... I think I'm going to buy some new clothes. Married life has made me fat...none of my nicer clothes fit any more, I'm doing what I can to slim down...but in the mean time I can't be dressing like a slob...so we'er going to a store called Steve and Barry's after Cody gets off work and freaking returns my car... if I can't find anything I like there, I'm going with the origianl plan and going to Old Navy. Old habbits die hard, and I'm not totally used to being poor. It's not the lable, it's the fact that every article of clothing I've gotten at Old Navy had looked good and lasted for a long time. They have good quallity clothes.

anyway...I have this overwhelming urge to go brush my teeth...so I'm going to scat for now.

Froggie...I wonder if you've been checking out the links with the blogs I've been posting. you can tell theres a link to the post by the tree dots by the title, click the title and therr you go...you also said you would email me last night...

loving you

2005-09-21T18:38:00.000-07:00

I will spend my whole life through
loving you (loving you)
winter, summer, spring time too
loving you (loving you)
makes no diff'rence where I go
or what I do
you know that I'll always be
loving you

if I'm seen with someone new
don't be blue (don't be blue)
I'll be faithful, I'll be true
always true (true to you)
there is only one for me
and you know who
you know that I'll always be
loving you

you know that I'll always be
loving you (I will spend me whole life)
I will spend my whole life through
just loving you

For Now

2005-09-20T11:46:00.000-07:00

Prinston: "why does everything have to be so hard?"
Gary: "maybe you'll never find your purpose."
Christmas Eve: "Lot's of people don't."
Prinston: "But, then I don't even know why I'm alive."
Kate Monster: "well, who does really?."

Everyone's a little bit unsatisfied
Everyone goes 'round a little empty inside
take a breath, look around, swallow your pride
for now, for now

nothing lasts, life goes on, full of suprises
you'll be faced with problems of all shapes and sizes
you're going to have to make a few compromises
for now, for now

but only for now (for now)
only for now (for now)
only for now (for now)
only for now

For now we're healthy, for now we're employed
for now we're happy if not overjoyed
and we'll accept the things we can not avoid
for now, for now, for now, for now,

but only for now (for now)
only for now (for now)
only for now (for now)
only for now

(only for now) for now there's life
(only for now) for now there's love
(only for now) for now there's work
for now there's happiness

(but only for now) for now discomfort
(only for now) for now there's friendship
(only for now) for now, only for now

(only for now) SEX! is only for now
YOUR HAIR! is only for now
GEORGE BUSH! is only for now

don't stress, relax, let life roll off your backs
except for death and paying taxes
everything in life is only for now

each time you smile (only for now)
it'll only last a while (only for now)
life may be scary (only for now)
but it's only temorary

everything in life is only for now

crafty me

2005-09-19T11:14:00.000-07:00

you've all heard the saying that "practice makes perfect" what does not practicing make? I just got a call from my boss saying she just got a call from one of my students mother's...they were upset because for the past few weeks, her son has been getting 20 minute lessons... she didn't talk to ME about it, and if she had, she might have gotten the reason, and a little lecture about if she wants her son to play the guitar it's going to be a joint effort between her and me, I can teach him everything I know...but I can't make him go home a repeat it until it sinks in...that's her job, so she needs to do hers and let me do mine. and when she does hers, my job will go that much more smoothly.

sorry...I didn't intend to blog about my work frustrations...I was going to tell you all that I had a very ggod night last night. We came home from church and ate lunch, then we made a list and went to the Goodwill, wal-mart, and the grocery store. then we came home and proceeded to get some things done that we needed to do but hadn't felt like doing...getting things set up in the living room...decorated for the season. I made a wreath (with Cody's help) and it looks really good. I'm proud of it.

we ate a late dinner and watched a movie. it was great fun.

I would like to blog in length, but I can't because I've got some "work" work to get done before my lessons tonight.

With One Look

2005-09-18T19:09:00.000-07:00

With one look I can break your heart
With one look I play every part
I can make your sad heart sing
With one look you'll know all you need to know

With one smile I'm the girl next door
Or the love that you've hungered for
When I speak it's with my soul
I can play any role

No words can tell the stories my eyes tell
Watch me when I frown, you can't write that down
You know I'm right. It's there in black and white
When I look your way, you'll know what I say

Yes, with one look I put words to shame
Just one look sets the stage aflame
Silent music starts to play
One tear in my eye makes the whole world cry

With one look they'll forgive the past
They'll rejoice, I've returned at last
To my people in the dark, still out there in the dark

Silent music starts to play
With one look you'll know all you need to know

With one look I'll ignite ablaze
I'll return to my glory days
They'll say Manda's back at last

This time, I'm staying, I'm staying for good
I'll be back where I was born to be
With one look, I'll be ME

bush is bad

2005-09-15T07:00:00.000-07:00

thursdays are really my only days to sleep in. I was really irritated that a car horn woke me up at 8. I was right in the middle of a really good dream...then this BOZO on his freaking car horn had to wreck it for me.

Cody gets off at noon today, so we're going to go to Norman to buy my books for my students....I'm excited about getting the books, because she said that I could get a "teaching tool" meaning, I can get a song book, or a guitar book specifically for the purpose of teaching. but if it happens to be something that I can use later in my career... ;)

The TV people came by (or at least that's what the note on the door said, but I never heard them knock...I think they were just being jerks, personally...then again, I AM a little biased...) needless to say, they didn't pick up the TV, so they are coming today between 11 and 1 and if they're not here, so help me God, there will be hell to pay. I'm tired of rearranging my entire schedule for these jerks not to show up. If I'm not mistaken, it happened when they BROUGHT the stupid TV out here...oh yeah...that was the day before I was supposed to go get Cody's brothers and sister and we were going to camp, and I still had mountains of laundry to do before I could go...and I was supposed to be a granny's doing laundry the day they were coming and they were like three hours late. If they haven't come by the time Cody gets off work, I'm tempted to leave it outside for them...

ok, I"m done ranting. I'm still tired. I shouldn't be...we went to be early last night. I just didn't get to sleep as late as I wanted...

I"m supposed to be getting paid today, That's a major plus. we maight even be able to go buy groceries :) Cody said I could open a separate account for "the wants" and use my money towards that. like if I want a new guitar, amp, or car...maybe a vacation...that's what my money is going to be used for, and Cody of course, will still be paying the bills...but incase we ever need any back up funds...my money will be there in a savings account.

I"m still waiting to hear from Luke on the quintet idea...I haven't totally decided on the name "we're five" I'm still open to suggestions...so start sending them.

I don't know what made me think of this, but I thought i would give ya'll a heads up...I dicided that because of all the spam going around on my blog (an others I've read) I would set up word verification...I'm just sick to death of crap being left on my blog. I get all excited to see that there's a comment left n my blog, and find it's some bozo that wants me to visit the Canadian Immigration web page...I've thought baout immigrating to Canada, but then I decided that it's not that bad here...gas is FINALLY going down...and my french isn't what it used to be...so I think I'll just stay where I am...

speaking of politics...my home page is playbill.com. it keeps me up on what's opening, closing, what actors die, and win what awards, and what's going on in the Theatre world. There's a new show called Bush is Bad. it's opening today I think. I thought it was freaking hilarious. I"ve enclosed a link, but since I've never used the link feature before, I don't know where it will show up, so look for it, and go visiti the site. it's great. if that fails, type in www. playbill.com and it's the second article.

I"ve got to get going. I've got to get dressed, and turn the freaking air up...it's COL in here. :)

Amanda Out

staff paper

2005-09-13T09:33:00.000-07:00

I am SUCH a dolt! I spent the better part of last night drawing up my own staff paper to work out some changes in an arrangement I've been working on for the quitnet I think I'm going to call "we're five" I was sitting in the lving room with a book that was pasge width, and blank paper on a clip board and everything...on a whim this morning, I did a search, and right there the very frist link was for free printable staff paper. they have just baout every kind of staff paper you can imagine. wide ruled, student ruled, grand staff, 9 staffs a page, 12 staffs a page, measured staff, staffs with trebble cleffs, staff with bass clefs, guitar tab, guitar fret board...really good quality stuff. I will continue going to this site for all my staff paper needs. www.freestaffpaper.cjb.net.

I'm waiting for some jerk wads to come pick up the TV...since we can't afford to pay rent, we decided that we can't afford the new TV, so we're givig it back. They were supposed to be here ten minutes ago. Time to be mean to the jerks at Aaron's...DON'T GO THERE FOR ANYTHING.

I was glad to see that Froggie blogged FINALLY!! I was glad to get to talk to you last night :) it's been a while. Sorry I had to go so suddenly...I was feeling ill...meaning I had to go puke up my non existant dinner. Being sick REALLY sucks.

I had my voice lesson today. I really like that Erica doesn't excuse for colds and allergies. but she did let me blow my nose... :)we actually worked the whole hour today, and I actually broke a sweat and got dizzy because of all the vibreation in the Mask. it was awesome.

ok...I've got to make copies and start working on that arrangemnet...maybe more tonight. :)

vocal jazz

2005-09-11T11:21:00.000-07:00

I made an inquary just now via email with a friend of mine to start a vocal jazz a capella quintet. I think it would be great. It's all The Real Group's fault. I've been listening to them, and I just can't help but LOVE thier stuff. I think I can do it.

The friend is Luke, who was also a "Student of Ma'am" only a couple years before me. He had her at Choctaw High...he's also the music minister at my church, the pastor's son (one of them anyway).

I trid to take it to the band...I tried to get eco-motus to get into some other kinds of music...but we're really stuck in a rut and Kacey said that vocal jazz really wasn't her thing...which is cool...it's not for everybody. and you really do have to love it and be passionate about it to be as dedicated as you need to be to do it well. I"m ok with that. but it's still a splinter in my mind...so I sent an email to Luke.

If FROGGIE was here, we could do it ;) just my way of saying that I miss you and our jam sessions.

I will need help on thinking of a cool name for a quintet, so suggestions are welcome.

I'm unusually tired today. I think it's because I still have so much to do. I have to go back up to the church for UC band practice from three to five. and i really don't want to go. I just don't feel like it...but oh well...maybe I'll get lucky and they'll replace me. They talked about making it more student driven...I don't blame them. It might make things a little eaiser on me...'specially with this new venture I want to undertake.

I have to get going...I'm about to fall asleep.

cheese is slipping off the cracker...

2005-09-10T19:41:00.000-07:00

guys...I think I'm losing it... the other day I was cleaning up some clutter and getting rid of junk and I found this old VHS tape under some papers. It didn't have a lable on it, so I poped in the VCR to see what it was. I noticed that it was a copy of Joseph and The Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat that Andy lent me like a million years ago...I was about to turn it off when the phone rang and I had some other stuff going on, then as I'm cleaning, I find myself half way listening, keeping up with the plot, the I find myself sitting down and paying attention to it, then singing along, and tonight, this very night, I found myself downloading some songs from the show...you ALL know that I'm not much of a Webber fan...but I don't know...something about this particular Webber show is just...catchy.

I was at my grandma's for a good chuck of the day...from about 7:30 am to about 8pm...but I was asleep from 7:30 til about 11...then I finally had to get up because I discovered that I had to pee and I couldn't hold it anymore. I stayed over there so I wouldn't be here by myself with the nieghbor's bugs... they have roaches, and slowly but surely they are finding their way into my kitchen...it's about to make me have a nervous breakdown... anyway...I discovered the Harry Potter game cube game...my cousin Brent (who is 7) has been living at my grandma's house, so he's got a bunch of toys and his gamecube there...you know I'm a HUGE Harry Potter fan...so I had to have a go at his game...I'm offically addicted.

for those that download music, illegally or legally...and lnike a cappella vocal jazz, I highly reccomend downloading The Real Group. they're sweedish, but BOY can they harmonize. it's really quite extraordinay. A favorite song of mine is called "I sing you sing" it's great.

Ok, I have to get going now. Froggie...sorry I can't wait up tonight...sometime soon I promise...what do you think of my theme time period idea for the wedding? It's cool if you don't like it, I was just throwing it out there.

I'm out

awake...for now...

2005-09-07T06:31:00.000-07:00

ugh...being sick sucks. I feel a little better though. I woke up during the night puking up all the drainage that found it's way to my stomach, not fun... I didn't go to school this morning. I can't stay awake for any period of time...I think all the family drama took it's toll on me...stress and tension invites my immune system to go on vaction...I'll catch anything going around. I got out of bed because I'm hungry. I was laying in there letting the musical Oliver! watch me sleep and I discovered that I was aboslutely starving...so I put some little smokies in the crock pot with some BBQ sauce and I'm waiting for it to heat so I can snack.

I have to feel better because this afternoon I'm supposed to go meet wtih Renee' again. She wants to show me the theater and hopefully I'll get brownie points for seeking her out...maybe it will show her that I REALLY want to do this. I met with her for just a few minutes yesterday and she seems really nice. I can't tell if she's a musical geek or not...and her office is in TOTAL disaray...which tells me that she's just like me...comfortable in the chaos as long as I'm surrounded by scripts... :)

Teaching last night went well. I'm supposed to go to Norman tomorrow to try to get some books for some of my students...I'm going to try to work on some handouts for the kids and parents...I've noticed that the guy I took over for didn't really work with the students...he just kinda started them in the middle...some of them don't read music...which is a requitrement both for playing the guitar as well as singing. So I feel like I'm starting from scratch. The first lessons for everyone was basically trying to find out what they know. I think it's important to get to know the students as well as them getting to know me...if we do'nt have some level of friendship, it won't ever work.

anyway...I have some resting to do...so I'm out...

PS C-bear...I've been reading your blogs, so I'm caught up a little bit...what else has been going on?

stuff

2005-09-06T19:38:00.000-07:00

as I feared, I'm getting sick. The right side of my throat just below the ear and on into the jaw is starting to swell...alas and alack...I am going to bed

teaching went well. the meeting went well. I have another meeting tomorrow where Renee` and I will have a chance to talk shop and stuff...

I"m out

The unplanned moratorium has ended

2005-09-06T06:25:00.000-07:00

sorry I haven't blogged in a while...every time I would try, the page would reformat and I would lose my blog, get frustrated and have to walk away...it just happened again, but since I'm not in a big rush I decided to stick it out and blog.

I agree with C-bear. Here's to September being better than August. Cheers!

some of the family drama has been cleared up. There is much relief.

Froggie, If you were on last night, I'm sorry. I really did plan to get on, but Cody wanted to watch a movie, and spend some quality time together, since we really haven't been spending a whole lot of time alone together, and by the time the movie was over (about 11:30) I was out cold.

I primed the youth room yesterday. I was supposed to have help, but I wound up doing it by myself...but it's cool because the KILZ and I had a vocal Jazz fest. The Real Group and The Manhatten Transfer, then ended the day with a little brassey Linda Eder. It was a good tune day.

I start work today. I'm really excted about it. it's almost excitement brinking on sheer terror...just the fact that I don't know the kids...you know...I think it will be fine though

I need to send a shout out to Bethamaphone! Welcome back!!

I have a voice lessone today. I'm excited about that too. My teacher is a Black lady named Erica Thomas. She's about a riot. WAY cooler than Nancy Curry every coud have been. I also have a meeting with Renee Reeves, who is the head of the Theatre Department. I emailed her a few days ago at Erica's urging, and she asked me to come by for a chat and a coke. She really sounds like a quality person. :)

Ok...it's almost nine and I have to leave by 9:30 and I still have to shower. I'll blog again post meeting :)

UGH

2005-08-31T11:13:00.000-07:00

ok ok ok...I know...I'm sorry...things have been crazy...this will s\be short and sweet...Cody starts work tomorrow, my aunt's boyfriend was sent to Georgia, everyone is depressed, and now my mom thinks my granny cut her out of the will, which is untrue, but it's yet another hairy tail I will have to share at someother point in time....

got to run

what else?

2005-08-26T07:17:00.000-07:00

Tony broke up with Amanda...I was supposed to practice with Kacey last night, but Amanda called like three minutes after I got there and she was hysterical...we picked her up walking down one of the busier streets of midewest city, brought her to Kacey's and let her cry for about two hours, then I had to call Cody to come pik me up and he and I wound up taking her home...

what else could go wrong...I think August's stone instead of a Ruby or Granite (one of the red ones) should be black onyx. it's been a TERRIBLE month.

Let The Punishment Fit The Crime

2005-08-24T18:58:00.000-07:00

I have a choice. I can string my bands drummer up by his balls, or I can tell him to start looking for another band.

He has lied for the last time.

You all know that playing the guitar is my favorite pass time and that my guitar, my Taylor is the jewel in the crown of my musicallity (is that even a word?) it's simpley the apple of my eye, and I treat her as I would a child.

I leave my Taylor at the church for two reasons... one, incase my place gets broken into, the renter's insurance we have won't cover the loss of the taylor...she's that pricey, and two: because I am up at the church playing her more than I'm at home playing, and I have a guitar here, so why not save a step?

I had my guitar lesson yesterday, and everything was fine. I put her on the stand and left...my drummer and his STUPID highschool jerkwad friends come up to the church so Jarod can practice (his drum kit is there because he is also the drummer on sunday mornings) and either him or one of his STUPID highschool jerk wad friends picked her up off her locking stand and proceeded to play her and BREAK A STRING. I know that is sounds very minor...but I use expensive strings...and Cody doesn't have a job...and I put my very last dollar in my gas tank so I could get home tonight... so I have a broken string that I can't afford to fix, practice tomorrow and church on Sunday, plus practice time...but what if it had been more serious than a string...what if it had been the neck, or they cracked the wood? there was no note, there was no apology, there was nothing...when I called Jarod, he lied about them even being up there, when Chris (my guitar teacher) told me that they were there when he left last night. guilty much?

I'm LIVID.

well...there is some good news...Cody's in the middle of a bidding war, there are two places that want him to work for them...and I just got a job as a voice/guitar teacher for a music acadmey. I interviewed for it today, and was hired.

Kacey, Jarod and i are supposed to practice tomorrow..and we're going to have a meeting...I need some suggestions as to how to approach the YOU'RE FREAKING FIRED subject...

HELP

I Remember

2005-08-23T12:40:00.000-07:00

I remember sky
it was blue as ink
or at least I think
I remember sky
I remember snow
soft as feathers
sharpas thumb tacks
coming down like lent
and it made you squint
when the wind would blow

and ice like vinyal on the streets
cold as silver
white as sheets
rain like strings
and changing things
like leaves

I remember leaves
green as spearmint
crisp as paper
I remember trees
bare as coat racks
spread like broken umbrellas

and parks and bridges
ponds and zoos
ruddy faces
muddy shoes
light and noise
and bees and boys
and days

I remember days
or at least I try
but as years go by
they are certain things
and the bluest ink
isn't really sky
and at times I think
I would gladly die
for a day of
sky

school

2005-08-23T09:23:00.000-07:00

I must admit, it was just a little more weird than I expected when I walked back into school as a student...but you know, I think I'm really going to like my music/voice classes...which may lead to me taking a few more next term ;)

overall, it was a good day....and I think I'm going to enjoy going to a *real* school. I can't really say that Platte was a *real school*...Rose has practice rooms...and three or four voice teachers...its' really cool.

after school I went to my grandma's where Cody was faxing applications/resume's to places (he quit his job by the way) and we wound up staying the rest of the day and night. We had to go pick up the boys from school because there was hearing and Jasper was supposed to be released, and Tonya would have to go pick him up...so we went and got the boys, brought them back to Granny's started fixing dinner and realized that the refridgerator was among the dearly departed...so Cody had to go to sears to pick out a new one, Granny and I went a little later to pay for it, then tonya and I cleaned out/cleaned off the old one, Cody and a neighbor moved the old one out and the new one in, the boys were being very rambunctious, and I started to get a headache, so after all that, getting dinner almost ready I went and laid down, thinking I would feel better in a little while...yeah...it turned into a migraine and we wound up staying the night...

Cody has an interview with a company he really DOESN'T want to work for, but he's going anyway, since they responded first. I have guitar lessons at 3:30 and I"m going to take a shower now.

C-bear...any news?

ABC's (as swiped for Cari's Blog)

2005-08-19T08:09:00.000-07:00

A-Age you got your first kiss I was 13
B-Band listening to right now The OBC of A Chorus Line
C-Crush um...CODY
D-Dad's Name Ricky D Terrell
E-Easiest Person to talk to Cody, C-bear, Froggie and Kacey have always been the ones I talk to ...about everything
F-Favrotie Bands at the moment BEN FOLDS BABY
G-Gummy Worms Or bears neither...I'm a fruit roll ups kinda girl
H-Hometown Midwest City, OK
I-Instruments Guitar, mandolion, a little banjo, a little piano, voice
J-there was no question for J...just thought I'd point that out
K-Kidsnone at the moment...we're trying
L-Last person you were pissed off at ...(blushes)...froggie, but we're past that now
M-Mom's Name Jennifer K. Terrell
N-Nicknames Red, Big Red, Scooter, Mandie
O-One Wish I wish, more than life, more than anything. I wish we had a child, I want a child
P-Phonbias nothing like automatnophobia...I do get clostrophobic sometimes...
Q-Favorite Quote "Do or do not, There is no try"
R-Reason to Smile I'm in love, I'm in love, I'm in love with a wonderful guy!
S-Song you sang last The Music and The Mirror
T-Time you woke up today 9:55
U-Unknown fact about me I used to have a tattoo on my bum
V-Vegetable You hate BEANS! (The Magic Beans!!!I let him go I didn't know he'd stolen my beans. I was watching him crawl back over the wall and bang! flash! the lightening crashed, and well that's another story, never mind, anyway...)
W-Worst habbits I bite my nails, and am OCD about things being prefect at rehearsal and show. I can't tolerate people that don't take rehearsal seriously...
X- X-Ray's You've Had where to begin...knees, ribs, neck, pelvis, ankels, hips, wrist, arms, feet...just about anything you CAN x-ray, I've HAD x-rayed.
Y-Yummy Food_I've been craving chocolate here lately...
Z-Zodiac SignI was born on a cusp..so some say Scorpio, some say sagitarious. You're guess is as good as mine.

yeah...deffinately a watercolor...

2005-08-18T20:05:00.000-07:00

It's been one heck of a day here...my grandma called me this morning and she was HYSTERICAL. My aunt's boyfriend Jasper gat taken in this morning. I had been up a good chunk of the night reading (Froggie...I highly suggest the author Mariah Stewart...not the sappy chick books (unless you're into that sort of thing...) she's got a series of murder mystery books (dead certain, dead even, dead wrong, and Until Dark. Great Books!)ok..sorry for th bunny trail...

Jasper got hauled off to jail because of the gun thing, and Tonya (my aunt) got written up by the city because she had a white trash yard (just about everything except the cars on cinder blocks...) and her and granny were both hysterical. I switched to authority mode and went and started helping Tonya clean up her yard...then went down to granny's and listen to her gripe about her back and not being able to sleep and how she feels so bad for tonya and the kids.

to top that all off, my aunt is bi-polar...meaning she's really depressed and is on suicide watch...so I"m babysitting her...and to top all THAT off...the anniversay of my Grandpa's death was on the 16th, and he was burried the day before my aunt's birthday, which is the 20th...the day after tomorrow. So I've got a suicide watch going on, and my grandma still talking about her dead husband (I know that sounds a little insensitive...but I had a nervous breakdown after he died...it's not good for me to hear about him all the time.) Cody's having a gazillion problems at work and is looking for a new job...

I really want to take a vacation from my life..."some beach....some where..."

The Music and the Mirror

2005-08-17T14:23:00.000-07:00

give me somebody to dance for
give me somebody to show
let me wake up in the morning to find
I have somewhere exciting to go
to have something that I can believe in
to have someone to be
use me, choose me

God, I'm a dancer
a dancer dances
give me somebody to dance with
give me a place to fit in
help me return to the world of the living
by showing me how to begin

play me the music
give me a chance to come through
all I ever needed was the music
and the mirror
and the chance to dance for you

give me a job and you instantly get me involved
if you give me a job then the rest of the crap will get solved
put me to work you would think that by now I'm allowed
I'll do you proud

throw me a rope to grab onto
help me to prove that I'm strong
give me the chance to look forward to saying
"hey listen they're playing my song"

Play me the music
give me a chance to come through
all I ever needed was the music
and the mirror
and the chance to dance

play me the music
play me the music

give me a chance to come through
all I ever needed was the music
and the mirror
and the chance to dance

BEN FOLDS ROCKS MY SUBURBS!!!!!!!!!!!!

2005-08-15T20:45:00.000-07:00

so...a few things have happend since I blogged last...Cody was supposed to get baptized yesterday, but due to the rain the church pool party was cancelled, so Kacey calles me up and said that if I wanted a "girls night" since our last planned event was cancelled because I had to go to Lawton to meet my dad for dinner on his first night in town (turning into a family tradition...)anyway...she said if I wanted to go hang out with the girls, there was a BEN FOLDS ticket waiting for me at kacey's house. BEN FOLDS...anyone who doesn't know who that is is SORELY missing out...but not just BEN FOLDs, it was also RUFUS WAYNEWRIGHT. It was a GREAT show. I stood up more than I should have, but we had a BLAST. I recommend everyone who has the chance to go see him...especially singers...at the end of his show, he makes the audience sing in three part harmony, standing on top of his grand piano. It was great fun. I found out later that night that the ticket for both of them, plus a no-name opener was just $33.00. BEN FOLD's tickets alone are usually in the $10-$15 range. So, it's a relatively cheep ticket for the calibur of show you get to see.

ok...moving on...I'm officially a student again. I start at Rose State College on Monday. I'm excited up nervous. It's been a while since I was in school, I'm hoping to get the hang of it fairly quickly. I'm getting a really good deal on tuition...my grandma is paying for it. She said I could pick any school in the area and she would pay for tuition and books. She said that she was proud of me for going back,

I am starting out really slow...I'm olny going to wind up taking like 9 hours this semester...but that's ok. It will sure beat the 21 I was taking at Central. I've got an Audition in the morning for applied voice. I find it odd that you have to audition for it though...and I'm going to try for whatever play/musical they are putting on this year...I THINK...I'm not totally sure I'm going to venture out that far...but I will let you know as soon as I decide.... I think my whole intended purpose in this is to maybe work my skills back up to at LEAST where they were in Columbus, and maybe make some contacts at the school and get an audition at the Lyric.

The chamberlin Company (where I worked before I moved to NE) closed, sadly...but there are other more professional theatres in which to seek employment. I would like to maybe start in Community Theatre...that way I could work and hone my craft a little more before I slipped into the Lyric...there's no doubt that's where I want to wind up...but I'm focusing on one goal at a time so I don't get too wrapped up in it. My first priority still needs to be Cody and you guys.

I start school on the 22nd...meaning that I can't go to KS for two weeks to help my mom (sorry mom!!) pack...I can just spare a weekend...that being said...I'm going to sign off and wait for Froggie to get on... 'night all

happy days are here again- OR- Plop plop fizz fizz oh what a relief it is!

2005-08-13T08:19:00.000-07:00

I know I said I was done taking it to the blog..but I'm just so excited and relived. Froggie and I are cool again. We chatted last night for about an hour...probably will tonight too.

It started raining about 5:30 this morning...I woke up and it was still rainging, around 9. My cousin Brent stayed the night with me last night. He was relentless in asking...so we went ahead and let him stay. We told him that it was going to be borring...but he wanted to come anyway... I'm about to take him to McDonalds to get some lunch.

we got two almost new ten speed bikes from my aunt and her live in yesterday...It seems I forgot to mention that. Cody and I are going to start riding bikes to get at least a little more into shape.
I know I probably shouldn't till after the surgery, but I feel so much like an invalid when I'm laying around not doing anything. I can't stand it. (I can't sit it either...hee hee hee)

Froggie asked what happened to the boys after ebing dragged out int thier underware at gun point by the ATF...well, Brent doens't have a kind thing to say about any cop. He says they are mean and he does't like them. Jasper doesn't seem affected by it at all...of course I have to believe that it's not the first time a house that he's been in was raided...his mom being the kind of person she is...

It's a whole messy situation. I feel bad for all involved. I know my aunt was emberassed,..and I don't think Jasper knew what to think of it....you know? Just one of those things where you didn't have a choice so you might as well cooperate.

anyway...Brent is still here, and we still have to go to lunch, so I'm going to take him.

I'll blog more later if I have the chance. There's still a LOT of unpacking and putting junk away to do.

you can pick your friends, but there's nothing you can do about your family...

2005-08-12T20:25:00.000-07:00

we ate chinese food tonight. Cody got a little bonus from work, so we went out to dinner...then we went to my aunt's house...

let me start with a little background here....my aunt is my grandma's adopted duaghter, who's a tomboy to the core. she loves horses, motorcyles, and guys that treat her bad...well, actually, her live in right now is a good guy...we like him. as white trash as they come, but he's a good guy. He'd give you the shirt off his back if you needed it. living with him has really turned her about as white trash as you can go...there's dogs and horses (in city limits mind you) in the back yard, truck campers on saw horses in the front yard...cow skulls painted and hung as art in the livingroom...you're starting to get the picture now aren't you?

She seems to really love him...she won't ever marry him because for one, she was married to a major bung hole who beat her and she swore that she would never get married again...two, because they are happily living in sin. My aunt has a son, by her last live in boyfriend, and her current live in has two kids, one that lives with them, and one that just moved out of thier house to live with her mother.

Jasper (I'm not kidding...that's his name...and he named his son that too...) is a convicted felon...because of a lifestyle that he no longer leads. Since he's a convict, he's not supposed to have any guns or gun related materials (holsters, cleaning kits, ammo, ect) well..he had quite a few fire arms...he's a collecter and was unaware that this law existed (he's new to the state of OK) I really think he didn't know...I mean...it's hard to think that someone could NOT know that...but I really think he didn't know.

anyway...he and his ex wife have joint custody of thier two kids (brianna and jasper) and Brianna (who is 10) decided that she didn't want to live with Jasper and Tonya (my aunt) anymore, she wanted to live with her mother (who isn't a savory character...once you've been a hardcore user, you can recognize other users...) apparently, she's married, but is shaking up with this other guy, trying to divorce her husband that's in prison...(kinda tells you what kind of people we're talking about here...) anyway...Jasper Jr. doesn't like going with his mother...it's rumored that she treats him badly, and her boyfriends abuse him...so Jasper stopped making him go with her. But she wants sole custody of the kids, and for Jasper's rights to be revoked. So she's trying to do everything in her power to see that he either goes back to prison, or is found unfit as a parent.

on August 4, the ATF raided my aunt's house at like 3:30 in the morning, drug them all out (Brent (my cousin) and Jasper Jr. included) in thier underware, and made them stand out there for over an hour while they went through every room looking for guns and stuff... They live in a very quiet neighborhood (just down the street for where I used to live and where my grandma still lives) so 7-10 ATF agents and cops storming onto anyone's place with gun's drawn will be noticed. they trashed the house, and the way I understand it, took the boys out at gun point. Brent told me that he was crying, because it scared him so bad (he's 7) and he thought that police were supppsed to be the good guys that helped you, not stuck guns in your face in the middle of the night...

he's right...I was thinking about this...what gives them the right to bust into your home and drag your kids out at gun point? They had a search warrent, but anyone can see that they were just kids.

Tonya also thinks that her house is bugged...she's not one of those paranoid types that thinks that the government is out to get her...she's just your average citizen living slightly under the paverty cut off line. she pays her taxes, abides by the laws...

Cody and I were talking about the posibility of the place being bugged. I thought that it sounded a little far fetched...but Cody said that it was very likely that the place was bugged because they don't need a warrent to do it anymore. They don't need a warrent to abuse your civil rights. Thanks to the Patriot Act. did you know that they passed it without even reading it? One senator voted against it. ONE out of the whole freaking house and senate combined. I was watching a Michael Moore movie...Farenhiet 9/11, and when he interviewed several people that voted for the partiot act and they said that they never read it. They never read it. What's going on with our government?

I'm against the patriot act. I'm against anything that will allow someone to bug my house and my phone, and not een need a court order to do it.

Sorry...I didn't mean to go on a tangent. I'm just waiting rather impatiently for Froggie to get online...She's a minute late :)

I usually try to keep politics out of the blog...but really...how much as a nation are we going to let this administration take away from us? What else do we have to give? I mean...this country was founded on the principal of freedom. Freedom to say what you want, the freedom to bear arms, to pursue life liberty and happiness...what more are they going to take away?

All I am going to say, is I'm glad that Bush will only be in office until 2008...he can't come back. Two terms have been served. we as a nation can only go up from here...we're rock bottom where we sit now.

to go or not to go...that is the question...whether tis nobler....

2005-08-12T10:55:00.000-07:00

we went to Lawton last night and had dinner with my dad at Cracker Barrel...which I'm not particularly fond of...but it was dad's choice and it was his treat...so can't really complain.

we talked alot about Cody feeling called to Ministry, and what needed to be done, what changes need to be made in our lives... then we talked about me going back to school...I want to, but at the same time...I don't know...I almost feel like I've grown out of all the college drama. and maybe it won't even be like it was in NE, but there was a LOT of dorm drama, and spectrum drama, and theatre drama, and I don't want to get into that again...but there are some classes that I would really like to take.

the local community college here has classes in recording tech, voice, country and western bands and ensembles, guitar lessons, and the theatre department is a little more well rounded than Cenrtal's...they have classes devoted to directing, make-up, costumes, dance, diction...I just don't know if I'm ready to throw myself back into the college scene... it would mean being involved in shows again..and I've been out of the scene too long. I haven't done a show since Hollywood, almost two years ago...that's a little long to come back...

I'm about to leave to go practice with Kacey, but I thought I would post at least a little blog...

I'm out

Trickin' out the Tarus

2005-08-11T08:34:00.000-07:00

so...I am tricking out my car...my gold for tarus with the red mirror...yeah...tricking it out...I have two ten inch crossfire subs in the truck (TAKING UP ALL THE FREAKING ROOM) and a blaupunkt amp, and I'm getting new door speakers. Cody had all these spare parts just laying around the apartment, and I asked him what he was going to do with him...he asked for suggestions, and I jokingly said he should put it in my car, at least the speakers, because my two upfront deeo speakers are blown...one to many loud showtunes...but he went all out...now I gots show tunes with BASS :) such a dork..anyway...at least now I have a nice clean clear sound with out all that hissing and popping of blown speakers.

I'm going to do some laundry today and take my grandma shopping if she feels like it. If she doesnt I'm going to keep on keeping on in the unpacking department...I am going to get a liberary card today. I just finished a good book and i need to read the others in the series. Not quite as good as the Harry Potter books, but pretty good just the same (TOTALLY different subject matter)

lots of big things going on this week...we're going to eat with my dad in Lawton tonight and talk about (seek Godly Counsel) about Cody applying for the youth minister position that Chis is leaving, then on Sunday we're talking to the pastor of our church about it, then, Cody's getting baptized on Sunday night, then he's interviewing for a new job next wednesday. it just seems like when you're moving in the right direction, God starts opening doors and new opportunities...it's really cool.

I'm also still planning that girl's night and need suggestions on what to rent...help me out here :)

I've got to run for now though...I might post again when we get back from Lawton if it isn't too late...otherwise, I'll post tomorrow.

Wednesday

2005-08-10T16:18:00.000-07:00

Today was Cody's day off. It was nice. We slept in, had a late breakfast (which is really rare for us...we've usually got so many things to do) then we drove down to Del City Music...I figure if I'm going to live here, I might as well know where the important things are...then we went to Guitar Center so I could show Cody my dream guitar, and then we went to this 75% off bookstore, and picked up a few books, then Cody wanted to check out a really good Christian bookstore, so we hauled it over to Edmond and went to Mardel, where I got a new Bible, and Cody got a new Bible...the strange thing about it...it's in RUSSIAN...he also got this "Learn Russian in 40 Lessons" he's really excited about it. I think we're going to learn to speak Russian together.

Then we came home and started finishing the unpacking process...at least it's starting to look like we've made a dent in there...and we FINALLY put together the bed in the guest room...and have it laid out the way we want it I think. We also hung the deco-shelf in the bathroom, and hung a few nails in the utility closet for the mop, brooms, and dustpan.

Over all we've gotten quite a bit accomplished...now if we could only decide on something for dinner...

anyway...better get off this thing...I might post again later.

laments of a house wife

2005-08-09T16:16:00.000-07:00

it's been a rather long, boring, and otherwise uninteresting day. I'm just about sick to death of the "moving in" process. I've been unpacking boxes and re-shifting junk all day and it just doesn't look any different than it did this morning. I had to take a break.

I did get all the laundry put away, and I started the ironing, and took Cody Lunch, then I came home and started rumaging through boxes. yeah..,doesn't look the least bit different. it's maddening.

I did stumble across a great old movie called The Major and The Minor. I haven't seen it in quite a long time, but it's great. It's about this woman Susan Applegate who gets on an over night train but all the drawing rooms are full, so she pretends to be like 12, and bunks in with Major Kirby, who is the director of a west point-ish school for boys called Wallace Acadamey. She falls for Major Kirby instantly, but he thinks shes 12 and he's engaged to this high faluting whiner called Pam, and Pam had a little sister, Lucy who IS 12, and they wind up rooming together, and Lucy has a plan to foil the wedding of her sister...and vows to keep Susan's secret if she helps her...it's full of confusing (if you're not watching it...) plot twists...I can't remember who's in it besides Ginger Rogers. Great flick.

Cody has a job interview next Wednesday. I'm hoping it will be the break we need to start saving for a house. He's interviewing with Altell...they've taken over AT&T here, and if he gets this job it would be great because it comes with benefits, and free phones :)My number would change AGAIN, but hey...it beats paying money we don't have so I can have a nice phone plan when family and friends call...if they call...

I might be going up to KS in the next few days to help my parents start boxing stuff up. Ugh...another car trip...I just can't go for hours in the car like I used to. It's getting too hard for me to get around. I'm going to have to have another knee surgery...my ACL was damaged...not sure how, but it's been going around that the doc that did my lateral release and replacement might have nicked it when she was placing the cap in place.

I think I'm going to start planning and girls night out for the youth group girls. There's not that many of them, and I think it would be fun to do a chick flick movie night...suggestions on what to rent? (doesn't HAVE to be chick flick, could be action, comedy, whatever, just so long as there's not a lot of swearing or naked butts... )

Cody just called and said he was on his way home, so I guess I'm going to try and whip up something for dinner...I'm not even hungry...maybe I"ll get lucky and he won't be hungry either...and we can put together the spare room and get the rest of te stuff in the living room taken care of.

I"m out

There's a Peck here with an Acorn pointed at me!

2005-08-08T18:01:00.000-07:00

alright...you may be wondering about my last post...I realize that it really doesn't sound like me at all...but you know, people change...and I haven't had a earth shattering, soul rocking change in a long time. Change is good...I have to embrace it.

It has been a stressfulfew days. Chris resigning and leaving the church, Cody's ready to jump into his old position, he's also ready to start a side business servicing the audio needs of charter busses with Boomer, I'm still feeling out my soap idea, my parents are moving to Lawton, OK, someone I think I know (maybe...not sure how she got my email...) is joining the national guard, my house is a mess,I'm still on uncertain terms with a friend of mine, and we're out of money. we're rolling pennies for gas broke. we've discovered that laying in bed, eating ice cream cones, and watching movies are good "dates". It's just been stressful, but through all the stress, we have a calm. a peace that I've never had before. I know that God will provide for us. It may not be the way we thought, but We are his children, and we will not want for any nessecity. And this I can say with total assuridness.(is that even a word? all I'm trying to say is, I know it's an absolute. there's nothing that we need that we will go without)

Cody and I are starting a bible study called 40 Days of Purpose, It's basically, the book The Purpose Driven Life. I really encourage Froggie and Mr. O to check it out. I've been really encouraged by reading it, and I've just been at it since yesterday. and the youth group in september is going to start a study called "the barbarian way" it's an exciting look at God's call for us as Christains to be radically different. We touched a little bit on it at camp.

I'm really sorry for everything. I'm talking to you. You know how you are...I can't say it enough. It's a very alarming feeling when you know you've screwed up and hurt your best good friend. and waiting to hear SOMETHING is like trying to remind yourself to breathe. It's just as agonizing as being hit repeatedly...you keep hoping that somehow you'll go numb and you won't feel it anymore...but you don't...you want the pain to stop, but somehow, it lingers just long enough... I'm ready to stop being hit. I really think that the sun has been up and down too many times on our anger...I realize that it's not exactly anger, but you're not happy with me, and I think that the unhappy feeling is going to stick around no matter how many times I apologize,...if we don't come to some sort of an understanding, it's not going to get better. I was so stressed about it that I bought a pack of cigarettes... I haven't smoked one yet...but it's getting harder and harder to resist the temptaion...and you know how hard I struggled with it, and for how long...

ok...I'm done with the aside to said friend.

we watched the first half of the movie WILLOW last night. many fun memories with C-bear watching it for the first time. "There's a peck here with an acorn pointed at me" "I love you sorsha, I worship you Sorsha, you nearly got us killed!!" "BEER!" great times. we're going to watch the second half tonight. I found out an interesting fact about Warwick Davis (Willow, and he was also Wickett in the last star wars movie, and in the ewok movies) he was only 18 when he did Willow, He looks a LOT older. ok,..so maybe it wasn't THAT interesting...but it was interesting to me.

We went to Brit Brat's (a girl in the youth group) indoor soccer game on saturday. That was a lot of fun. I think we're going to make that our Saturday night...she's a really good player, and it's given Cody the push to play soccer...he caught the bug...I'm not playing soccer...I can barley run anymore. I'll be the official cheer leader... :)

alrightie...I think I'm done for now...I might be on a little later...see if you're ready to chat...or maybe even call...

Bosom Buddies

2005-08-08T09:48:00.000-07:00

well...I guess I'll just wait. I emailed you and called you with a hope to make this grievious betrayal right, but I have yet to hear anything...So I guess I'll just wait. It's ok...I'm more patient now a days anyway. You know where I stand.

I wish to once again apologize for the lack of communication and half hearted promises and committment.

This week has been one lesson after another. There's been a lot of church related issues going on. My Youth pastor resigned yesterday. I can't convey the deep feeling of loss...it hit me as well as the kids really hard. Chris wasn't just our youth pastor, he was my teacher, my mentor, my friend. It's going to be very hard to picture the youth group without Chris.

On the up side of this, Cody had felt called to special service ministry for quite some time, and is applying for the position of youth minister. (he can't be an actual PASTOR until he goes to siminary and becomes ordained by the church.) This being said, there's going to be a lot of changes in my personal life, as well as in my relationships. I'm making a public statement of my faith, and I'm making a public commitment to my friends, Jess, and Cari. (Don't get you're planties in a twist, I'm not going to try to convert you or make you believe what I believe, you have chosen your path. I'm going to love you where you're at, and be the friend I always was...hopefully a bigger better model.)

Jessi, the comitment I'm making to you is the same one I made a long time ago, but have strayed from. You've seen me through some pretty hard times...there was more than once I showed up on your doorstep with a black eye and a bloody lip... We've laughed and cried together, we've played and sat in silence. I know that I've done you a bad turn. I'm not proud of it, but I am human, and I will mess up from time to time. But like I've told you a few times over the past few days, I'm committed to fixing the issues we've come across. I'm sorry that you were hurt. I am human, I will fail you. I challenge you to pray for me that I might whole heartedly honor the promises I've made. But in order to fix what went wrong we need to talk...that means the ball is in your court, I've gone as far as I can go without you meeting me half way. I would hate to have to set this aside...the sun has been up and down too many times with us being upset with each other. we need to set this right as soon as possible.

that being said...there's really nothing else to say. except a little song by the late, great Jerry Herman, best done by Angela Lansbury and Bea Aurthor.

BOSOM BUDDIES

We'll always be Bosom Buddies
friends, sisters, and pals
we'll always be Bosom Buddies
if life should reject you
there's me to protect you
If I say that your tongue is vicious
if I call you uncouth
it's simply that who else but a Bosom Buddy
will sit down and tell you the truth

though now and again I'm aware that my candid opinion may sting
though often my frank observation might scald
I've been meaning to tell you for years you should keep your hair natural like mine
if I kept my hair natural like yours I'd be bald
but darling

we'll always be dear companions
my cronie, my mate
we'll always be harmonizing
orphan annie and sandy
like amos and andy
if I say that your sense of style's as far off as your youth
it's simpley that who else but a Bosom Buddy
will tel you the whole stinking truth

each time that a critic is written you're voice is the voice of a frog
straight to your side to defend you I rush
you know that I'm there every time that the world makes an unkind remark
when they say Vera Charles is the world's greatest lush
it hurts me
and if I say your fangs are showing
Mame pull in your claws
it's simpley that who else but a Bosom Buddy
will notice the obvious flaws

I feel it's my duty to tell you it's time to adjust to your age
you try to be when you peggeth my heart when you're lady McBeth
exactly how old are you Vera, the truth
how old do you think
oh I'd say somewhere between 40 and Death
but sweetie

I'll always be Alice Tokelesk if you'll be Gertrude Stien
and though I'll admit I've dissed you
I've gossiped and gloated
but I'm so devoted
and if I say that sex and guts turned you into a star
it's simpley that who else but a bosom Buddy
will tell you how rotten you are

Just turn to your Bosom Buddy
for aide and affection
for help and direction
for loyalty, love and forsooth

remember that who else but a Bosom Buddy
will sit down and level, will give you the devil,
will sit down and tell you the truth

open letter...you know who you are

2005-08-05T10:55:00.000-07:00

I really don't know what to do. I'm sorry that you're upset with me...but is it really worth all this? I've called you three times, and left messages two of those times. I've apologozed, what more can I do? what more do you want? I wish I could drop everything and come back and see you...trust me, if given the chance to come see you, I would accept it in a heartbeat. You know that.

You have NO IDEA what hell I went through when I was there. The belittlement, the snide comments...you don't even know. I don't like this as the icing on the cake...

Hunter got an infection, a bacterial yeast infection (we just found out) on his man parts...he's not circumcized...and that played a part. He was swollen and red and in a lot of pain. Since Kitty thought it was my fault, I took him to the Emergancy Room with her and Cody, and Megan went along too. we were there until around 9:30 or 10, then we got back, I wanted to call you, but realized that in my haste to get the three teens' stuff together and get them in the car and get going, I had forgotten the cell phone with Jerry's number in it. And your new cell number was in my lap top, in windows, which crashed, and before I remembered that it was there, Cody wiped Window's off of my computer.

I didn't want to go to Jerry's in the middle of the night and you not be there...that would have been really awkward, and to add to that, if you weren't there, would he remember me, would he be willing to give me your number or new address? I know that if someone that my grandma didn't know showed up and asked for my phone number or address, she would tell them to go to hell. I didn't want to put Jerry in that position.

I understand that things get busy and crazy, with moving and work, I totally understand that because we're going through it too. We're not totally moved in to our bigger apartment yet. We just took about 3 loads of stuff last night.

I feel sick to my stomach all the time. If you could just drop me a line that says you're still angry and don't want to talk to me for a while that would be preferable to no word at all.

It just seems like a minor offense to be burdened with such a punishment. Let the punishment fit the crime.

we went to 6 flags over texas with the youth group on wednesday...talk about feeling it the next day...we left the church at 6am and got back to the church about 1:30 am. LONG trip. we spent the whole day out there in the heat. I caught a couple shows though. In the last one I saw I found that I went to High School with one of the guys in the group and he remembered me. it was funny...he was a senior when I was a sophomore. He played the scare crow when I played Dorothy in Wizard. It was cool to catch up with him after all these years.

Cody had to go back to Dallas for work today, and he took my car, so I was getting all psyched to drive Cody's truck, get out there, laundry in the back of the truck, and the stupid thing won't start...so I had to have granny come get me.

I'm going to practice with Kacey, she'll be here any minute to get me...but I thought, while I had the chance, I would make one last ditch effort to try to get SOMETHING out of you...

and...on the off chance that it was you that left that anon. comment (it doesn't sound like you...not your style, but on the off chance...) I was upset at first, which I'm guessing was the intended objective. It was a really low blow, especailly if it was you that wrote it, because you know how much having a baby means to me, since we're not even completely sure I'm able to have my own children... I'm not upset anymore. If it was you that wrote it, you were (maybe still are...) upset, and I know you wouldn't do or say anything to hurt me that badly...

and if it wasn't you, someone was in a hateful mood....and you know what...you should start checking all the facts before you leave such hateful comments on someone's blog...not very nice at all...

anyway...that's all I have for now.

Philosophy

2005-08-05T07:04:00.000-07:00

won't you look up at the skyline
at the mortar block and glass
and check out he reflections in my eyes
you see they always used to be there
even when this all was grass
and I sang and danced it by the horizion
and you were laughing at
my helmet hat
laughing at my torch

go ahead you can laugh all you want
I got my philosophy (keeps my feet on the ground)
and I trust it like the ground
that's why my philosopy (my Phil-)
it keeps me walking when I'm falling down (os-o-phy)

I see that there is evil
and I know that there is good
and the in-between I never understood
won't you look at me I'm crazy
but I get the job done
yeah I'm crazy but I get the job done

I said go ahead you can laugh all you want
I got my my philosophy (keeps my feet on the ground)
and I trust it like the ground
that's why my philosophy (my Phil-)
it keeps me walking when I'm falling down (os-o-phy)

I pushed you 'cause I loved you guys
I didn't realize you weren't having fun
I dragged you up the stairs and I told you to fly
you were flapping you arms, you started to cry
you were too high, no, too high

you may take this all forgranted
you take the mortar block and glass
and you forget the speech that moved the stone
but it's really not that you can't see the forest for the trees
you've never been out in the woods alone

so you can laugh all you want to
I've got my philosophy (keeps my feet on the ground)
and I love you you're my friend
but you've got no philosophy (my phil-)
and now it's time for the song to end (os-o-phy)

Answers from Me to Froggie's quiz: Good Things Come In Threes

2005-08-02T07:05:00.000-07:00

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD (OTHER THAN THIS ONE):
1. theatermajor22
2. iluvmyguitar83
3. guitarpickinfoo

THREE THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. I am musically inclined
2. I can cook
3. I have red hair

THREE THINGS YOU HATE (can improve) ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. I have a rather short fuse
2. I'm a nail biter
3. I don't handle stress v ery well
THREE PARTS OF YOUR HERITAGE:
1. Irish
2. Irish
3. French

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. flyig in small planes
2. dying childless
3.dissappointing Cody

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. Music
2. Internet
3. Dr. Pepper

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. green T-shirt
2. yellow cat in the hat pajama pants
3. my wedding ring

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS OR ARTISTS AT THE MOMENT:
1.Robert Preston
2.Harry Connick Jr. (is ALWAYS IN THE TOP 3)
3. Sutton Foster (right now)

THREE NEW THINGS YOU WANT TO TRY IN THE NEXT 12 MONTHS
1. not exceeding our income...
2. not having to juggle bills
3. having a baby

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP (Love is a given):
1. Honesty
2. Understanding
3. Humor
** I know those were your answer's Froggie...but they are so good :)

TWO TRUTHS AND A LIE: (in no order, it’s more fun that way)
1. I cheated on Cody
2. I have a fake knee
3. my hair is curly

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE SEX YOU ARE ATTRACTED TO THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. be willing to laugh and have a good time
2. step up and be the head of the relationship (spiritual head)
3. his name has to be Cody James Kelly

THREE THINGS YOU JUST CAN'T DO:
1. turn my back on my family and friends
2. turn my back on what I believe (christianity and all that...)
3. give up broadway showtunes

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. live theater
2. music
3. internet

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. talk to Froggie
2. make my back stop hurting
3. eat something...

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING:
1. owning my own business
2. being a mom
3. broadway (yeah, it's always in the top three :))

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. Ireland
2. NYC
3. somewhere tropical

THREE KID'S NAMES:
1. Gracie Jo
2. Chloe Michelle
3. Adien (no middle name yet)

THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. have a baby
2. act again
3. pass on meaningful advice to someone that needs it

THREE PEOPLE WHO HAVE TO TAKE THIS QUIZ NOW:
1. um... whoever has time...not too concerned about it
2.
3.

And now a little about you....
Who are you?

Amanda K. Kelly

Are we friends?

I hope so...

When and how did we meet?

During rehearsal of Once Upon a Mattress

Do you have a crush on me?

um..no...I have envied your talent on occaison

Give me a nickname and explain why you picked it.

I can't think of one off the top of my head...I'll keep thinking on it though

Describe me in one word.

Jess :)

What was your first impression of me?

well, you know how sopranos (especially ex-lead ones) can get catty...I was afraid you would be like that...but you weren't :)

Do you still think that way about me now?

um. no

What reminds you of me?

there are a lot of things...

If you could give me anything, what would it be?

you're heart's desire

How well do you know me?

pretty well I think

When was the last time you saw me?

too long ago..it was the second to last time we were in NE we met at Bula's and I had a bad headache...

Ever wanted to tell me something but couldn't?

no, you're one of the few people I could tell anything to.
Have a great day!

life or lack there of

2005-08-01T07:45:00.000-07:00

I pinched a nerve in my back. I dont know how I did it, but it hurts like a son of a gun. It happened yesterday. I cant think of a way I could have done it. I mean, we moved a love seat, and a chair and a chest of drawers, not to mention a couple end tables and a coffee table, both glass...so ...but I lifted everything the righ way. When I worked at Sams we had extensive training on the 'right way to lift" and I didn't lift from my back, I lifted (with a buddy) from my legs...then I laid down to watch TV and ended up taking about an hour and half nap...which wasn't exactly restful...I was watching TV, so I was laying on the couch, and there was this fly who thought dive bombing into my face was great fun. not cool...but I woke up and that's when my back started hurting...it needs to stop hurting by Wednesday...I didn't just pay $40 bucks so Cody and I could go to Six Flags over Texas for us to not go, or to go and me be miserable...again...not cool.

so...is anybody reading anymore? I know Froggie is mad at me, so that's her reason...but I Haven't heard anything from C-bear in quite a long time...wondering how all the "adam reynoldson" stuff went.

everyone else I figure is dead...Scotty hasn't blogged since april, and Raven has dissappeared off the face of the earth, and Bethamaphone is off at Camp Geneva being a cammp coounselor...wonder when she'll be getting back...I miss talking to the girl,..no one is ever on line any more...I guess I should be happy for them..they all have lives...I'm the one that is now stuck at home, with no Hunter, and nothing but cooking, cleaning, and laundry to look forward to...

I know i just blogged about my new hobby, but I've got to save a little cash up as start up money, because Cody's raise doesn't kick in for another week or something...so...I can't start that until I can buy some matierials. which is ok. I'm totally ok with that. cody has been more than willing to listen to all my ideas and help me make decisions...until I can find someone to partner up with...even if I don't...I think I can handle it on my own. I've got some information coming to me from the SBA, and am looking into taking a business class or two...

anyway...Today is the grand opening of Cody's store in Edmond, so I thought I would make some cookies and take them over and meet the people he works with.

I'm out

hobby, hobby, who needs a hobby?

2005-07-30T15:14:00.000-07:00

I'm really tired. I was up until 3 AM reading that new Harry Potter book (Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince) a very thrilling read. I couldn't put it down. I can't tell you what happens...READ THE BOOK!! it's very good...but if you're not really into the Harry Potter Scene, that's ok...wait for the movie, I'm sure it will do the book justice, all the others have to date...

now...let me see here...oh yeah...I'm starting a new hobby...I'm going to start making soap, bath salts, bubble baths, and the like. I"m fairly excited about it..I'm going to start making a web page to maybe even start marketing what I make...I think it will be a fun little business venture...I'm taking ideas for names for the brand...I'm looking for something cute, and possibly having something to do with my Irish/Celtic heritage...but I'm not sure about that yet. Frog...this is why I DESPARATELY NEED TO TALK TO YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I've been on the computer for the better part of the day looking up prices on essential oils, soap molds, glass and plastic bottles and jars, I'm about tired of looking at the computer screen. I did brake for a few hours to go finish my laundry at Granny's and take Boomer his Duster's Root Beer and Runza sandwhiches...we talked for a long time, He wanted to know my views about getting a group of students together to ride bikes to Falls Creek next year. I thought he was joking...it's about 100 miles...but no, he's serious...I told him that with my knees and hip the way they are, I couldn't possibly ride a bike 100 miles, but I would be more than happy to drive a car and pass out water to they bikers as they pedal past. :) I think that boosted his moral a little.

I still don't have all the laundry done. I left the last load in the dryer. I just couldn't stand to be there another minute. I was tired. Tired of reading this new book that Cody's mom gave me to read, tired of folding clothes, tired of being awake, tired of listening to Granny grip about her back, and her health, and anything else she could think of. I know that sounds terrible, and i would never say any of this to her...there just comes a point when you CAN"T TAKE IT ANYMORE. so I left her with a kiss on the head, and a wave as I walked out the door. I love my grandma, I really do, but she hasn't been the same since Pop died. A part of her died with him. She is SO depressed, even though it HAS been over 7 years...I'm not saying that losing a partner is something you ever get over, I'm not saying that she should be over him...I had a nervous break down when he died. He was the one person that I could tell everything to, a person that I was not finsihed learning from. He practically raised me. I had a nervous break down and was institutionalized...but I've made the CHOICE to get on with my life...she hasn't. Her house is alwasy dark, she never cooks unless she's cooking for Cody and I or my aunt and her family...it's really depressing being around her. I've chosen to Honor his memory by living a life he would have wanted me to lead (not to say there haven't been a few mistakes along the way...) she had just stoped living...and she thinks she's a burden to everyone...which isn't true because if it was, we'd have put her in a home a long time ago...

alright, I'm done with that little rant...I've got to think of something for dinner...I'm not hungry. I ate a cheese burger at quarter to three...but Cody might be hungry, and we have to think of him now too, dont we...?

ok, I've got to go.

moratorium has ended...I'm back :)

2005-07-29T07:36:00.000-07:00

well, we are child free...for the moment...I can not say more...:D

we've had a rather busy time this month...we had Hunter with us until the 21st, then I took him to wxchange him with his three older siblings on the 22nd. Megan and I bonded hard core. We laugh and tease each other and go into those inside jokes that you get at camp, and no one else knows what you're talking about...yeah that was good times :) From what I understand, Court and Tanner had a good time too...Court played X BOX the ENTIRE time he was here...Montanna (tanner) wanted to go swimming the entire time he was here...but he only got to go once because apparently, the apartment pool was closed...I wasn't here, I don't know. so in retaliation, he didn't bathe the whole time he was here...it was a stinky car trip back to NE...i've never smelled Body Odor that think. It was aweful.

someone at camp bought Megan the sixth Harry Potter book. She said it was really good, so she lent it to me when she was done reading it. I will own it because I own ALL of the Harry Potter series,, but I can't afford it right now, so I"m very thankful

I'm not pregnant...I know that's got to be what some of you are thinking from the opening line...much to my dismay, I am not...but since you are my closest personal friends (unless there are strangers reading this, welcome abaord :)) Cody got promoted over the weekend, He's now second in command at a new store they are opening in Edmond OK on Monday. Now, for those of you that don't know anything about Edmond, it's one of the ritzier neighborhoods in the OKC metro area...(check out www.ci.edmond.ok.us) and not only does he get to move out of the midwest city store, he gets a manager's commission (5% of the gross profit) that may not seem like a lot, but with all the homes in Edmond being $500,000-$1,000,000 homes, I'm not worried. Just with the numbers he was making in the Midwest city store he told me that he had figrued a nice $400 raise in his check every two weeks...so I'm not worried. I'm excited...especially when he told me what we were going to do with the extra money. First, I'm getting health insurance, THEN, we're going to see a specialist and try and figure out why I can't seem to carry a child. and he said that no matter the cost, we were going to fix what was wrong. which I thought was very sweet of him...he knows what having a child means to me.

on the way back from Kansas I told him that i wanted him to get a little deeper into my interests....I've lived down here for nine months (since we've been married) and haven't seen a SINGLE show. and he let me listen to the broadway channel almost all the way home. He promises to rectify the situation.

um...what else...last night we had a rather romantic dinner, since it was our first night that we weren't DOG tired, and it was just the two of us...I found the most rockin' hot awesome recipe and it was very light and totally yummy :) I don't even know what to call it, but it was cream of mushroom soup, cream cheese with chives (which I made myself) butter, itallian salad dressing mix, and white wine...mix it all together, and pour it in a baking dish over boneless skinless chicken breast, and bake for an hour. the recipe recommended that it be served over angel hair pasta seasond with butter, garlic powder and onion powder...it was SOOOOOOO good. if you're interested, lemme know and I will pass it along to you. :)

Froggie, I'm so sorry that I didn't get to see you this trip...I really wanted to, but my monster in law...er...Kitty made it impossible. She worked Cody the entire time we were up there. She had him in the field harvesting with the others...she's pregnant again...it's another boy...this will be number nine. she's due November 10th.

C-bear, You know I love you and want you to be happy, and I would never try to force someone to believe what I believe, but there's no need to cringe when someone mentions God, just because you've chosen a different past, doesn't mean He doesn't exist...He's still there, and He still loves you :)

I've got nothing more to say...I'm going to take a shower and take my grandma to Sam's Club...the n try to get to practice some with Kacey...

dude

2005-07-24T17:19:00.000-07:00

so... got back from camp yesterday. It was fun. Life changing. Hot. God worked in a lot of people's lives...including my sister in law Megans. I was blessed to be able to lead her to Christ. that was an awesome thing for me.

leaving tomorrow night to go up tp NE. Froggie...sorry I can't bring your cds, because I can't find them...but as soon as I get some more CD-Rs I WILL get them done and Mail them to you...but I CAN bring you some DVDs I was going to bring you Smokey Joe's cafe, and if there's anything else you want...lemme know because I'll get right on it.

we watched Constine last night. a very well thought out and creative movie. I was impressed. I"m not usually a fan of God vs. Devil movies specifically in a catholic setting, but i rather enjoyed it.

in smelly news, our deep freeze (that was plum full) gave out and we lost a WHOLE LOTTA FOOD. and it smelled bad (my thoughts went directly to the movie The Labyrinth when Ludo is telling Sara that the bog of eternal stench smells bad. "Smell Bad!!")

I watched most of ITW with Megan my sister in law yesterday when we got home. I fell asleep right before the Baker's Wife died...she fell asleep right after...that's how tired we were...

on the way back from Camp, one of the vans has a blow out. Everyone was ok, thankfully, but i was in the lead van, and we had to turn around a jump a meidian to get to the caravan. we almost got pulled over by the cops...the power of prayer amazes me.

Cody's working on computers right now...I can see not a lot happened in the WHOLE WEEK that I was gone...because there was ONE new blog. ONE out of four peoples blogs ONE PERSON wrote a new one...

I think we're going to take the kids sight seeing...it's going to storm before too long. I'm out

am I ever going ot have time to have time for myself??

2005-07-17T14:19:00.000-07:00

so...I leave for camp tomorrow. I'm at my grandma's doing laundry right now and packing. I would have had all the laundry done already, but I was waiting for that STUPID tv delivery guy for three hours, then it was time to go...then on Friday I went to KS, on saturday, I picked up and dropped off children, then came back home. last night was entertaining said children...

last night the cops showed p at my apartment. It was about 12:15, and I was just about to drift off into peaceful slumber...when there was a loud banging in the living room...so I walked in there and almost ran over Court on the way. They said the cops were at the door...so I checked, sure enough, there was an officer standing there. He was like "good evening" I was like "it's after midnight, what can I do for you?" they were looking for a chick named Linda, or someone that drove a blue or green monte carlo...I have never seen a blue or green monte carlo in my section of the parking lot...it IS a rather large complex, and there was no one named Linda in my apartment...it was kinda scary/creepy because earlier that night I mixed some daquaries for Megan (who is NOT of drinking age...) and myself...so it was rather odd that a cop just HAPPENED to show up...learned my lesson.

C-bear...glad that you're having a great time living life :) so...you think something might happen with this Matt fellow...? best of luck to you :)

I just realized that Clint Walkingstick (my best friend's Husband) reminds me of Dr. Evil from Austin Powers...that's what we're watching right now...fun times.

Camp promises to be a great time...as always...I promise a nice lengthy blog about it all when I get back...I'm not sure when I will have time, But I will get 'er done.

Brenda, don't know if you read this at all...but I'm taking the clothes that you lent me to camp... :)I'm going to need something nice to wear, and since you're not going to be there to lend me anything...I'm just taking what you already lent me...don't worry, will have the outfit washed and back to you the day after we get back, this time, I promise :)

I'm going to go for now. I don't know that I'll blog again before I go because my church is having a pool party tonight, and I'm going to take the siblings-in-law, then Megan and I are going to make sure we have everything we need for camp tomorrow...I'm going to get some new flip flops at some point... :(

alright, I'm out

meh

2005-07-16T15:43:00.000-07:00

I just got back from Kansas...with two brother in laws, one sister in law, and one sister in tow. It was a jam packed car...not cool. right now Lori is at my grandma's, Megan is in my room watching a movie, Tanner is the the guest room playing with my legos, and Court is in the living room playing video games...we're all waiting for Cody to get home. I feel like I should be entertaining them, but I'm not sure what to do...so they can entertain themselves until Cody gets home...which hopefully won't be long.

nothing much happened during the trip...so nothing to report there...Meagan and I leave for camp monday morningI'm excited to go. I miss camp all year long. ;)

c-bear still waiting to hear from you...

I've got to get going for now...maybe more later.

bloggity blogg blog

2005-07-14T10:40:00.000-07:00

so...I'm waiting on these people to deliver my newer TV...they are 45 minutes late, and I call the store to ask where they are, because I've got to go to my grandma's and do luandry, because I'm going to my mom's tomorrow, then MOnday leaving for a week...and going in the buff is not an option considering that it's church camp...so I'm waiting...and I called the store, and the lady says, "well there were three other deliveries infront of you, so they should be there shortly," and I say "the guy we talked to yesterday to set it up told me they would be here by noon because I told him that I had an appointment, and needed the tv to be here as soon as possible" then she says "no, he told you that the TV would be there between 12 and 2" and that kinda made me mad because she wasn't there when he told me...infact I didn't see a woman one except for Annett and she was answering the phones...so I didn't try to hide the fact that I was a little more than put out by her snide comment...and the Irish in me came out...hard core.

I told her "I didn't see you there when he was telling me what time the TV would be delivered. I talked to Matt...a supervisor I believe, and HE told ME and my husband that the TV woud be here b noon, so it needs to be here 20 minutes ago...where are the delivery people?" she kinda stammered that they were on their way back to the store to get my TV and get it to me. I told her it better be here soon, or I would be coming up there and I would cancel the deal.

I wouldn't mind so much except for not only am I going to granny's to do laundry, but I'm also going to the store for her...and that means that I have to be there before she decides to make my aunt go instead, making her mad, and making me look bad...so I'm on a time table, PLUS the longer it takes them to hook eup the TV and speakers that we bought, the LESS time I have to do what I need to do for Granny and do my laundry...I'm going out with the girls tonight, and need to have time to get ready for that, and pack for this weekend, oh, and pack for next week. I'm just about livid.

I talked to her about oh...50 minutes ago...and guess what...the TV STILL isn't here. I moved to the next town over...not the next state...it doens't take 50 minutes to get from MidWest City to Del City...it just doesn't. getting angry but trying to keep my cool. I did call my grandma and tell I would be later than expected...she wasn't too happy about it, but she understands...so hopefully that bought me a little time.

anyway...the TV people still aren't here...I'm getting more ticked by the second...I've got to go...

I'm out

Something Good

2005-07-14T10:21:00.000-07:00

perhaps I had a wicked childhood
perhaps I had a miseralbe youth
but somewhere win my wicked, miserable past
there must have been a moment of truth

for here you are standing there loving me
whether or not you should
so somewhere in my youth or childhood
I must have done something good

nothing comes from nothing
nothing ever could
so somewhere in my youth or childhood
I must have done something good

for here you are standing there loving me
whether or not you should
so somewhere in my youth or childhood
I must have done something good

nothing comes from nothing
nothing ever could
so somewhere in my youth or childhood
I must have done something
something good

the moratorium has ended (for a short time)

2005-07-13T19:28:00.000-07:00

hey ya'll...looks like there has been a lot going on since last I blogged...C-bear..we need to talk. Froggie...tried to call you at Jerry's today, but there was no one there, so I didn't leave a message...I know I could have, but I was going to call you're cell instead, just haven't done it yet. I will I promise.

There has been much moving and getting things organized. We are getting a new (well, at any rate, it's new to us...) 52 inch TV for the living room, and we're either going to sell the 27 inch to Cody's mom or put it in our bedroom. We have yet to decide.

I have not bought new flip flops yet, I'm saving my money to put the curl back in my hair. I had it relaxed for the wedding...and I did not realize that the lady was putting on a permanent relaxer, so this weekend, I'm going to my mother's and (well, technically, I'm going on Friday to my mom's and coming back on Saturday, without Hunter, but with Lori (my little sister) Court (Cody's brother) Megan (Cody's sister) and Montanna (tanner...Cody's other brother) I'm meeting Kitty (mother-in-law) in Salina, KS on Saturday at 12:00 high noon. The perfect time to battle with one's in-laws, don't you think? ANYWAY I'm meeting her and trading children. Then head back home after we make the switch.

THEN I will be gone for a week...Megan and I and my church youth group are going to Fall's Creek. It's a baptist church camp that goes on all throughout the summer. I look forward to it every year, infact, it's why I became a youth sponsor...so I could go for FREE :) nah, there's a much better reason...because it's really cool to see God work in the lives of the kids. It's worth the trip down (it's about three hours away from where we live) and the time away from Cody and the internet to be in on it. It really is.

Living in the new place is great. I'm really excited about all this extra room. We have an office , a spare room, a master bedroom (with a 3/4 bathroom) and of course a fairly good sized guest bathroom. I just put the pantry back together today, and Cody brought the kitchen table here, so we are no longer eating dinner on the floor. That's a nice feeling. The other day we but the bed on the bed rails...before that it was just a mattress and a box springs on the floor...it was cool for a while, but it was good to be elevated again. It's really hard on my hips and knees to get up after sitting that close to the ground. that's why I was most excited for the kitchen table to arrive...

Tomorrow, I think I'll be going to the comdey club with Kacey, Amanda, and Ashlee again..I'm looking forward to it, but at the same time hope that we don't go because I'll be leaving on Friday and want to spend the extra time with Cody...so it's kinda a catch 22...

anyway, I've probably been on here too long...I just can't help it, I'm the true internet junkie...I will post again if anything blog worthy happens tomorrow :)

I'm out

small moratorium, and dead flip flops

2005-07-07T08:25:00.000-07:00

well, we didn't get approved for our first choice in bigger apaprtments, but we did for our second. We're semi moved into a three bedroom one and 3/4 bath. larger than life inving room, and a decnet kitchen.

we still have internet but I htink today is the last day for it, because we're going to be moving the computer, so unless I can get my laptop to work at IHOP, there will be a small moratorium.

whilte moving yesterday, I broke my favorite flip flops. They are no more. MY tan and black ones...that just fit my foot...I cried. It was very sad. Now I have to get new ones an break them in, it sucks.

today plans include moving the clothes. on tuesday night we moves some of the kitchen and most of the bathroom, then yesterday we finished the kitchen, all accept what's in the kitchen freezer, and some of the bedroom. I'm moving clothes and stuff I can lift. I'm going to borrow my grandma's truck.

that about does it for what I have time for. I have to find and charge my cell phone, but if certain parties need anything and don't call me, you're in big time trouble (cough C-BEAR cough)...sorry...something was tickling the back of my throat...

I gosta go.

I'm out

happy 4th

2005-07-05T08:42:00.000-07:00

I hope every one had an enjoyable 4th. ours was alright. We went to my cousin Patty's on the 2nd to celebrate the 4th, we ate good food, and visited with people. We watched a few fireworks. As we were walking to the car to leave, there was this cute little beagle puppy that was kinda following us, and whimpering, so I told Cody to go put hunter in the car, I would take her back up to the house. I took her back up to the house, and set her down, thinking she would find who ever she belonged to, but when I looked back, she was right on my heels, I sat down in the car, and she jumped in the car too. She was SO cute, and I didn't want to give her back, but then I thought about how I would feel if someone drove off with my dog, so we drove up to the house and I started asking people if they knew of anyone missing a puppy, and finally found her owner. Then it was decided on the way home that we were getting a beagle. :)

We're supposed to find out today sometime if we can move into the bigger apartment right across the street from Cody's store. That would be a very spacious and economical move. since we'd be so close to Cody's store, he could walk to and from work, andhe could also walk home for lunch instead of going out for fastfood every day. so we would save an averrage of $140 every month because of gas and food. not to mention, the apartment is cheaper rent and comes with a fireplace, a den, a living room, kitchen, two bedrooms, and one and a half bathrooms, and a patio. I've got big plans for that place. I'm excitedly awaiting the phone call.

last night we went to Kacey and Clint's for burgers and such...it was ok fun...not great fun, not knee slapping fun, just ok fun. The guys from Clint's band were there, so after they ate, they all went in the back room and started doing band sit, and Kacey, Cody, Hunter, and I were out in the living room talking computer stuff...we watched Ben Fold's Songs For Silverman DVD. then they put in some Oasis bull-corn. I'm not a fan of Oasis.

we got back and just hung out. It was nice to relax...although it didn't do me very much good. I was wound up like a ten day clock. bouncing off the walls...I got up at midnight and played on the computer...then COdy came in and asked me to come back o bed..so I laid there for the longest time trying to go to sleep. it must have worked because I woke up at 10:30.

I have been on a SERIOUS ben folds kick here recently. I heard a song last night called Gracie, and it was so pretty and cute it made me almost cry. It's about his daughter, and before we lost the baby this last time, we were picking out names and Gracie was our girl's name.

I think I'm running out of things to talk about ... I'm trying to think...

oh yeah, I was mistaken about the time I would be coming up to NE...It will be the 25-27 and I will have time to do some stuff, if anyone wants to hang out, I hope that's enough notice. We'll be bringing people back namley Court, Tanner, and Megan from camp/my house. And I will be child free. I will miss Hunter very much, but there have been times when I have wished he hasn't been around so I could do the romatic things I did before he came here. candle light dinners and the like. It's hard to have a romantic candle lit dinner when there's a four year old there...you know? But I will miss him when we have to take him back.

I think I really truley am running out of things to say. I'm getting hunrgy, but I don't know what I want to eat.

I'm gonna go find something to munch on.

There's Always Someone Cooler Than You

2005-07-02T13:00:00.000-07:00

Smile like you've got nothing to prove
no matter what you might do
there's always someone out there cooler than you
I know that's hard to believe
but there are people you meet
they're into something that is too big to be
expressed
through their clothes
and they'll put up with all the poses you throw
and you won't even know

that they're not sizing you up
they know your mom fucked you up
or maybe let you watch too much tv
but they'll still look in your eyes
to find the human inside
you know there's always something in there to see
beneath the veneer
not everybody made the list this year
have a beer

make me feel tiny if it makes you feel tall
but there's always someone cooler than you
yeah you're the shit but you won't be it for long
oh, there's always someone cooler than you
yeah, there's always someone cooler than you

now that I've got the disease
in a way I'm relieved
cause I don't have to stress about it like you do
I might just get up and dance
or buy some acid washed pants
when you don't care that you've got nothing to lose
I won't hesitate
cause every moment life is slipping away
it's ok

make me feel tiny if it makes you feel tall
but there's always someone cooler than you
yeah you're the shit but you won't be it for long
oh ther's always someone cooler than you
yeah there's always someone cooler than you
oh, there's always someone cooler than

life is wonderful
life is beautiful
we're all children of
one big universe
so you don't have to be
a chump

and you know (and you know) that I won't (that I won't) hesitate (hesitate)
cause every moment life is slipping away (slipping away)
it's ok (it's ok)

make me feel tiny if it makes you feel tall
Oh, Cause there's always someone cooler than you
yeah, you're the shit but you won't be it for long
oh there's always someone cooler than you
yeah there's always someone cooler than you
because there's always someons cooler than you
(cooler than you)
boy (cooler than you)
girl (cooler than you)
Sam(cooler than you)
Maria
nerds go wild (yeah)

Scientist

2005-07-02T11:03:00.000-07:00

Come up to meet you,
tell you I'm sorry
You don't know how lovely you are

I had to find you
Tell you I need you
Tell you I set you apart

Tell me your secrets
Ask me your questions
Oh, let's go back to the start

Running in circles
Common tales
Heads on a science apart

Nobody said it was easy
It's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be this hard

Oh, take me back to the start

I was just guessing
At numbers and figures
Pulling your puzzles apart

Questions of science
Science and progress
Do not speak as loud as my heart

Tell me you love me
Come back and haunt me
Oh, and I rush to the start

Running in circles
Chasing tales
Coming back as we are

Nobody said it was easy
Oh, it's such a shame for us to part
Nobody said it was easy
No one ever said it would be so hard

I'm going back to the start...

Your Eyes

2005-07-01T13:41:00.000-07:00

Your eyes
As we said our good byes
Cant get them out of my mind
And I find I can't hide
From your eyes
The ones that took me by suprise
the night you came into my life
where there's moonlight I see
your eyes

How'd I let you slip away
when I'm longing so to hold you
now I'd die for one more day
cause there's something I should have told you
there's something I should have told you
when I looked into your eyes
why does distance made us wise
you were the song all along
and before the song dies

I should tell you
I should tell you
I have always loved you
you can see it in my eyes

LADIES NIGHT

2005-07-01T08:32:00.000-07:00

I don't know how much of this I can explain without you scratching your head and saying "what the fuck"...but I will try...

I left my grandma's house to get ready to go about 7. I spent the first thirty minutes on the copmuter downloading the song suggested by C-Bear, which I think are awesome, and I'm listening to them right now. I changed my shirt, brushed my hair and walked out the door at quater til eight, and went to Amanda's, which is where we all meet. I'm the first one there, as usual, then Ashlee shows up, the Kacey. (Just a public service announcment, Amanda cute her hair and had bangs fir the first time since Jr. High. It looks REALLY good)

ok, so we get there and we're driving to the club, we were literally almost run over by a New Jersey Semi, and then as we were getting off at out Exit, we hear a honk, so we look over to the left, and there's this white van and this guy's ass is up against the window. FULL MOON, I had never been mooned before. I was shocked. I literally just sat there with my mouth hanging open. Then we get to the club and we were talking about drinks, and they asked me (I guess becuase I pretentded I wad a bar tender at applebees...I liked to mix drinks, but really, I was just a server...) what Vermouth tasted like, and I told them that it was really bitter, and it almost tatsed like someone farted in a glass of water and put a lemon on the side. Thus coining the term Fart Water, which spun off most of the jokes of the evening. Then the shows started...and the first comic sucked monkey balls, he was aweful, the second guy, we thought had potential because he was black and had been on BET's Comic View, which if you've never seen it, and can get past the white people jokes, is pretty funny. but no, he sucked about as bad as the first guy...so, there was the intermission, and we all decided that if the last comic was as bad as the first two, and we weren't laughing our asses off within the first 15 minutes, we would be leaving.

So this last comic was Micael Mack. HE had several pluses to his credit. When he walked on stage he picked up a beautiful Ovation guitar. I was drooling over it, almost. It was goregous. So that was a big plus in my book. The second credit was he was actually funny. I laughed so hard. He takes popular (or once popular songs since most of them are older 70's-80's )songs and rewrites them to be kinda raunchy funny about sex, and life, and women that were once men...funny stuff. I bought his CD so if anyone wants to give hi a listen...just lemme know.

so anyway, the last sketch he did was by far the best and it was probably one of the most amazing things I've seen in a long time. all the lights went out, and he goes to the back of the stage (which was relativly small so from where we were sitting we could see him really well with the lights off) he put on this wig, and glasses, and had the sound guy play this cd...it was a mix of songs that started out with the Beatles, Come Together, and he's got this flashlight that he's hoding over his head so that it appears to be a spotlight, and he's lip snycing to the song, and then he pulls out this ventriliquist dummy head on a stick from behind his back, and you can tell that it's supposed to be Yoko Ono and we find out that he's a ventriliquist...and he does this Yoko Ono bit, then that song fades out and he goes back to the back edge of the stage, and puts on another wig and a latex mask that has make up on it, and he turns around and "we're not gonna take it" comes on and he looks ust like dee what's his bucket from Twisted Sister, the he goes back and puts on square glasses and the Proclaimers coms one with the song "I would walk five hundred Miles" and he lip syncs to the solo part, but when the duet starts, he pulls another dummy head from behind his back, and it looks just like him, with the square glasses (just FYI the proclaimers were brothers, twins in fact) and he does that, then he goes back and gets a dummy just as the song Billy Jean comes on, and sure enough it's Michael Jackson, and his nose falls off, and then this "magic hand" comes out of the dark and of course it's got the glove, and as he's lifting higher, we see a baby doll hanging upside down...then the song changes and you see a dummy head that looks like Whitney Houston, and she's "singing" I will always love you, and then this huge mountain of "cocaine" appears, and "Whitney" dives face first into it, then the song speeds up to chipmunk speed..then the song changes again and he goes back and puts on this long black wig and rabbit teeth, and the song was Bohiemian Rahpsody. He does almost the entire song...you know the part where it goes "I see a little silhouette-o of a man" well, (this is the part that's going to be hard to explain so bear with me) He put on this head peice...his head was in the middle and there was a head on either side of him, and one on top of his. (ever seen the video? that's what it was supposed to be like) and he controlled them with triggers and light buttons it was really cool. THEN (oh it gets worse...)the song fades out, and he puts one this long black wavy wig, and sunglasses...he looked JUST LIKE Howard Stern, this would be a good time to tell you that he was wearing a black t-shirt, black-shic brown-ish pants and a brown over shirt...he grabs the mic and yells out "I am the king of media" as he's kinda pacing the stage and then he rips off his shirt...then he rips off his pants..and you see he's wearing a tiger print underwear, then he turns his back to the audience and takes that off, and he turns back around and he's wearing a regular breig with a Porkey pig where his "business" ought to be...and guess what, it's mouth moved...and it was lip syncing "nothing really matters, anyone can see, nothing really matters, nothing really matters to me" and that was then end of the show. I think all of you would have totally laughed your asses off. It was just that funny.

we had a really great time. I would go back and see him and I would even pay for it ;)

so..what's new out there?

Froggie, I'm still waiting on you to send me that link...my computer is still on the frizz, and I can't get to it because it's not in m favorites, and I'm sure I'm just missing a back slash or some such nonsense...

nothing really exciting going on now....I'm getting ready to make some potato salad to take to my cousin's 4th of July party that's on the 2nd, tomorrow :) So that about does it for me.

I'm out

just a broadway baby girl

2005-06-29T22:30:00.000-07:00

there's nothing really new to report. I'm going out tomorrow night with the girls. Look out looney bin here we come. It promises to be a real fun(nny) excursion.

We just got in from swimming and showers, and uh...other various activities, and now, Cody is dipping us some Ice cream cones. We're going to watch K*19 the Widowmaker, seeing as how it IS only 10:30...

tomorrow day plans include going shopping with granny...a favrite passtime...

More tomorrow...Icecream is done :)

Is This Thing On?

2005-06-28T20:41:00.000-07:00

I think my lip is infected...those that need to know what I'm talking about, do, all others will have to die of curiosity...no...I did not get my lip peirced...but that's all I'm going to say.

my computer blew up. I had 427 MP3's of just show tunes, that's not counting counrty, oldies, jazz, choral, and gospel music...I have some hope becuase Cody says he thinks he can salvage the hard drive. I hope so... some of the MP3's I have are really rare and hard to find.

Since reading C-Bear's blog, I've been listening to the song "Ain't No Way" by Shoshana Bean. It's a perfect blend of R&B and Soul. And since Cody got me these head phones with a Mic built in for internet chatting...let's just say, it's tempting to lip sync...and I actually caught myself lip syncing and getting into the song...because if I ever were to lip sync to a song, this would be the one...Shoshana has the perfect grit in her voice. She's the ultimate "white girl with soul" I've ever heard. She's amazing.

Ok...Froggie...I'm sorry, I'll need you to send me a link to your blog again...I have to to reinsert it into my favorites on my account on Cody's computer.

I love the DVR. I have recorded so many movies on it, it's unreal. The old ones that I can't find or buy right now that come on TV...it's greatt.

I actually sat down and watched the movie Brigadoon today. I had never seen it. I didn't know Gene Kelly was in it, or I certainly would have bumped up higher on the old priority list. Anyone who's ever seen Singing in the Rain (and C-bear, if you havn't, putit at the top of your list, and be glad I'm not shaking my finger and saying "shame on you", Frogg, you too...at least you've seen part of it...) could see why I love Gene Kelly, he's a phenomenal dancer, and a great tenor.

I was suprised at the story line...but I thought it was cool. I didn't realize that it was a Lerner & Lowe show (they wrote My Fair Lady) It's about this village in Scotland called Brigadoon, and there's a miracle and two lost hunters, and love, and conflict, and it's a great show about how with love, anything is possible. The music left a little to be desired, but over all, a good show.

I watched show boat too...a great story that involved the late, great Howard Keel (calamity jane, kiss me kate, kismet)I highly recomend it.

Alrighty, I would love to stay up and wait to talk to you Froggie, but I've got to go back to the bedroom now, Hunter is trying to sleep, and I've got the light on, and it's hard for him...and Cody's ready to go to bed...so I'm gonna jet.

blah blah blah

2005-06-27T08:16:00.000-07:00

I'm bored. I just woke up from this freaky ass dream, and Cody's at work and Hunter is still asleep so I can't start cleaning again...so I'm blogging.

There's not a lot going on right now. Cody is starting to feel better, which is a blessing, because now we can get back to life as normal, instead of life at the pace of Cody with a cold...

There was so drama a few days ago, but luckily, laying it on the line with the right people dissolved the situation. I hope...

When I woke up both of my hands felt like they were 80 times their normal size...that kinda freakwd me out.

I've been watching Smokey Joe's cafe almost non stop. The dances are great, and the music is great, it's just a great show. One that I'm glad I got to see live. I did stop watching it long enough to think about burning a dvd for Froggie...but I can't do it yet because the DVD burner is on Cody's computer...and I HATE Cody's computer. Everything is so small on the screen...he's got I think it's a 17" or a 19" moniter, and window's xp was designed for about a 14 or 15" moniter, so everything is really hard to see...and I'm used to typing on a laptop keyboard, where everythinis nice and close together, but his keyboard was made for someone with big fingers, which I don't have, so I can't type comfotably. I guess I better get used to it though, I've got to make a brochure for Cody's work about Car Alarm systems. and It will be way easier to work on it on a bigger screen and where I can spread my information out and just work. My space is kinda limited with a laptop.

Hunter just woke up. He's taken to coming in my room (where I hang out when he's asleep, every kid needs a little privacy) climbing into that empty spot where Cody once was (about four hours ago) and laying down and covering up and saying "so, what are we going to do today?" It's cute. I will be sad when I have to send him home.

I've got to clean out the trunk of my car in the next day or so...I just realized that I would be trading in my four year old for a 17 year old, a 16 year old and a 13 year old...and since one of them is going to camp with me, I know they will have a lot of luggage.

I just realized that I'm getting really hungry. I don't know what to eat...I thought about eggs, but it's almost lunch time. I'm out of my favorite cereal, and the pop tarts that I like...but I'm sure I'll find something.

Ok--I'm out

You Know Who You Are

2005-06-25T11:08:00.000-07:00

I Don't Want To Mention Any Names

I've got a story to tell thought you might listen
I can always count on you we're such good friends
Now I need to talk about my situation
And you're the only one who'll understand

Now someone's got designs on my baby
She's making her intentions very plain
We both know this old gal that I'm talkin about
But I don't want to mention any names

Well, she's asked him to slow dace way too often
she's made suggestions I don't like at all
I'm trying to let her know that I'm wise to her game
But I don't want to mention any names

Well now, I can understand why she'd want him
Oh, You've even said yourself he's quite a prize
She's about a good a friend as you are
Come to think of it she's just about your size

If she don't back off there's gonna be some trouble
Now I'm prepared to make that very plain
I just hope I've said enough,
And just between the two of us
'Cause I don't want to mention any names

Well, she's asked him to slowdance way too often
she's made suggestions I don't like at all
I'm trying to let her know that I'm wise to her game
But I don't want to mention any names

Yeah I'm trying to let her know that I'm wise to her game
Oh but I don't want to mention any names

Fist City

Well you've been making your brags around town
that you been loving my man
but the man I love, when he picks up trash
he puts it in the garbage can
and that's what you look like to me
and what I see's a pity
you better close your face and stay out of my way
if you don't want to go to fist city

If you don't want to go to fist city
you better detour around my town
'cause I'll grab you by the hair of the head
and I'll lift you off of the ground
I'm not saying my baby's a saint, 'cause he and
but he wouldn't cat around with a kitty
I'm here to tell you gal to lay off of my man
if you don't want to go to fist city

Come on and tell me what you told my friends
if you think you're brave enough
and I'll show you what a real woman is
since you think you're hot stuff
you'll bite off more than you can chew
if you get too cute or witty
you better move your feet if you don't want to eat
a meal that's called fist city

If you don't want to go to Fist City
you better detour around my town
'cause I'll grab you by the hair of the head
and I'll lift you off of the ground
I'm not saying my baby's a saint 'cause he ain't
but he wouldn't cat around with a kitty
I'm here to tell you gal lay off of my man
if you don't want to go to fist city

I'm here to tell you gal to lay off of my man
if you don't want to go to fist city

You Ain't Woman Enough

You've come to tell me something
you say I ought to know
that he don't love me anymore
and I'll have to let him go
you say you're gonna take him
oh but I don't think you can
'cause you ain't woman enough to take my man

Women like you, they're a dime a dozen
you can buy 'em anywhere
for you to get to him I'd have to move over
and I'm gonna stand right here
it'll be over my dead body
so get out while you can
'cause you ain't woman enough to take my man

Sometime's a man's caught lookin
at things that he don't need
he took a second look at you
but he's in love with me
well I don't know where that leaves you
oh but I know where I stand
and you ain't woman enough to take my man

Women like you, they're a dime a dozen
you can buy 'em anywhere
for you to get to him I'd have to move over
and I'm gonna stand right here
it'll be over my dead body
so get out while you can
'cause you ain't woman enough to take my man

No you ain't woman enough to take my man.

No body says it better than Lorretta Lynn...If you think you can take him, try. Be prepared for the consquinces. If he didn't love me he sure as hell wouldn't have married me, and I don't doubt for a second that he's faithful to me, because if I did, I wouldn't have married him. Be ready for the fight of your life...bitch.

On Broadway

2005-06-24T20:34:00.000-07:00

They say the neon light are bright on broadway...

you all know the song...it's been the theme for many (once) aspiring actor like myself, made famous by George Benson, who is often mistaken for the guy that wrote it...but that's just not true. The guys (yes, there were two of them) that wrote that song are two of the most talented writers of the 50's era, Lieber and Stoller, (sorry, I don't know the first names...) they wrote such famous numbers as the above mentioned On Broadway, Kansas City, Hound Dog, Spanish Harlem, Jailhouse Rock, Dance with Me, I'm a Womnan, and many others.

All the songs I just mentioned have something else in common, not only were they all written by the same hall of fame, grammy winning songwriting duo, they are also part of a grammy award winning show called Smokey Joe's cafe. (at this point Froggie is probably scratching her head saying "wasn't I supposed to get copies of several CD's INCLUDING but not limited to Smokey Joe's Cafe?" to which I would have to blush and answer "yes, you were, but I was kinda hoping to give them to you in person, and the last time I was up there and saw you I remember having a splitting headache, and the Mike's Hard Berry I was having was good but not helping the situation...so please fogive me...I am working on it. I promise.")

Well, on top of it being a great show, and I was SO excited to get the CD's, I'm even more excited to report that while we were at wal-mart getting a network cable, I happend to look across the aisle and see THE DVD. You could have knocked me over with a feather...I did my pouty lips, and said please...and Cody being the bestest husband in the ENTIRE WORLD said I could get it...so Froggie...you can expect a DVD too ;)

we finally got the back overtime money we were expecting from Cody's job at Columbus Electronics, it was a lot less than we were expecting, of course they would have to take out over a thousand dollars in taxes, but it was about a thou-five, so we were happy to put it in the bank :) we finally had enough money to get a computer desk so we could retire the card table, becuase frankly, it looked horrid. We also sprung for a new printer that's an all in one printer, fax machine, and copier, not to mention network ready, so I can print from my computer and Cody's computer (where the network is running through) doesn't have to be on, or in windows (he's got two opperating systems)

I put the new desk together myself. I was so proud of myself. once we started putting stuff on it we found my only mistake...which was a minor one, so it doesn't merit explanation.

Cody came home from work early today. He's been sick the past few days. I feel so bad for him. I wish there was more I could do for him...but he seems content with the cup of peach tea (it takes a lot for me to give up my peach tea...) that I make for him.

I finally got all the laundry put away. That was a huge task, but it's all done. I'm trying SO hard to get everything looking perfect so we can have the apartment people come inspect the place so we can pay them $100 and move into our two bedroom townhouse, with two floors, two bathrooms, and a washer and a dryer. So, I'm trying like mad to get everything boxed up and looking nice so they will approve the transfer.

My dad just interviewed for a job in Omaha, the other day. He interviews in Tulsa on Monday. I hope he finds a job soon. The people here in OKC turned him down because he's TOO qualified. I was mad. I wanted them to move back here. I know that there's other jobs, but I think my mom really wanted to come home, for which I don't blame her. It's a great place here.

I am working on some audition pieces. I just can't stay out of the Theatre. That means if I get a part, even a small one, I expect ALL OF YOU, to come see me in the show. I'm auditioning for the 2006 cast of actors at the Lyric, and at the Jewel Box. If you wish me luck, you better be saying "break a leg" anyone who's ever acted with me knows how supersticious I am about such things.

We bought this 2000 flushes blue stuff for the toilet. It's supposed to turn the water blue...but it hasn't. I was wondering if this was normal, if I should give it some time, or was is supposed to be instantanious, and should I call the 2000 flushes guy and complain?

I'm anxious to hear from C-Bear. I was glad to talk to her the other day, and glad to get some stuff sorted out, but I'm waiting to hear if there were any new developments.

I have finally done it, and there should be thunderous applause for me. I have quit smoking. I've been working on it for a while now, and I have kicked the habbit. I deserve a Mini-Wave and a CELEBRATION. Throw me a party, give me a cookie, and a high-five. This girl is tar free. (Froggie, this is where you tell Mr. O that there is hope, and I know he's been smoking longer, but if I can do it with all the stress I've been having than by golly so can he :) )

Oh, speaking of (and to) Froggie and Mr. O, I want you guys to know that when we move into the two bedroom townhouse, that mean's we'll have a second bredoom, and you two have to come down and be our guests. Since we didn't get to do the Tony's thing this year, we'll have to do a Super Bowl thing, or somthing...you know I don't care about football, ah hell, it doesn't even have to revolve around a televised award show or event...I just really wish you guys would come down and visit. I'll even say "GO HUSKERS" and promise we'll go shooting, and maybe even fishing. We miss you guys so much. But you have to come when we can go out on a Thursday night because that's LADIES NIGHT at the Looney Bin, and I know you would have a great time.

Sheesh...I think this is the longest blog I've written in a while...I'm just so excited about the new stuff we bought today. And I'm even more excited about moving into the new place, and I'm even MORE excited about aud'ing for the theaters...there's some major stuff going on down here...so...yeah...that's about all I have to say about that.

What's new out there?

For Cody

2005-06-23T21:20:00.000-07:00

With Just A Little Love

When our check bounces at the store
when the whole world seems at war
you bring me peace of mind once more
with just a little love

When the boss says I'm ten minutes late
and the stack of bills just won't wait
ooh, you take the worries away
with just alittle love

Just a little love
and affection
you bring a touch of perfection
to a world thats sometimes crazy
and so mixed up
with just a little love
you have changed me
you made me see why the good lord made me
and you can do miracles
with just a little love

when our old car won't run
and all my dreams come undone
you'll make it right, won't you hun
with just a little love

with just a little love
and affection
you bring a touch of perfection
to a world that's sometimes crazy
and so mixed up
with just a little love
you have changed me
you make me see why the good lord made me
and you can do miracles
with just a little love

You must really love me
Tell me why do you put up with my foolish ways
You never take to heart the crazy things I say
Oh I know you could walk out on me any day
There must be a darn good reason why you'd even want to stay

You must really love me
How can it be true
There are things you'll take from me
I won't even take from you
Everytime I fall apart
You always pull me through
You must really love me
As much as I love you
You must really love me
As much as I love you

I appreciate the honesty you've shown to me
And the way you tell your friends that you belong to me
And when you hold me tight it always sets me free
Oh this must be the way that true love was meant to be

You must really love me
How can it be ture
There are things you'll take from me
I won't even take from you
And Everytime I fall apart
You always pull me through
You must really love me
As much as I love you
You must really love me
And Lord I'm glad you do

I wish I could go back to college

2005-06-23T09:23:00.000-07:00

I wish I could go back to college
Life was so simple back then
what would I give to go back and live
in a dorm with a meal plan again

I whsi I could go back to college
in college yo know who you are
you sit in the quad and think "oh my God
I am totally gonna go far"

how do I go back to college
I don't know who I am anymore
I wanna go back to my room
and find a message in dry erase pen on the door

If I could just drop a class
or get into a play
or change my major
or fuck my TA

I need an academic advisor to point the way

we could be sitting in the computer lab
4 am before the final paper is due
cursing the word 'cause I didn't start sooner
and seeing the rest of the class there too

I wish I could go back to college
how do I go back to college
I wish I had taken more pictures

but if I were to go back to college
think what a loser I'd be
I'd walk through the Quad
and think "Oh my GOD
these kids are so much younger
than me"

2005-06-22T18:55:00.000-07:00

Cody was up all night sick. He's got quite a cough. I was up all night with him. This evening about six thirty I settled down to play on the computer in the comfort of my bed, and was slightly suprised to wake up a couple hours later. I needed the rest though. I was up almost every hour on or nearly on the hour.

When Everybody finally got up and around we went to wal mart, then to the china house, (really good take out chinese) then to my grandmas to eat it. Then I I go out and pull my car around the back so I can wash it. Hunter wanted to help me. I don't know how much of the car we got clean, but Hunter sure enjoyed getting sprayed with the water hose.

we came back to the apartment and changed into our swim gear, and went swimming. It was an over all exhuasting day.

I think Cody wants to go swimming again...

I've been anxiously awaiting updates from C-bear, which I got, and I thank you for. Please keep me posted as things unravel...glad
that the suspected main cause of the problem was dealt with. wink wink nudge nudge.

Froggie, hope you're doing better. and I hope you transition from cable and internet to no cable and no internet easier than I did. but then you know I'm a grade a number one internet junkie.

I guess we really are going swimming again, so I better change.

CHIAO

drama

2005-06-21T19:20:00.000-07:00

we just came in from swimming. We were at my grandma's all day doing laundry...and wokring on some towels. She fed us dinner then we came home and Cody had to go back out for a few, so Hunter and I got ready to go to the pool. We spent about an hour out there, and I'm now watching the AFI Lifetime Achievement Award, A Tribute to George Lucas.

It's been an otherwise drab day...which has become the Norm since I gave up acting. I miss it. But I gave it up willingly. I've been thinking about going back to college to finish my degree so I couldbe in a show again. I doubt that it's going to happen. I know that he wants to start a family, but I've been thinking about it.

C-Bear is having stress. I'm sorry that you are, I wish there was something I could do about it. please keep me posted.

Amanda and Tony were having stress too, but she says things are better now.

I haven't talked to Froggie recently, but I hope you are doing better than you were the other night.

Cody ran over my aunt's boyfriend's daughter's bike tonight. She parked it right behind his truck and he couldn't see it...just adding to the drama. I think everything is worked out now.

I think I'm going to wrap it up now...I'm getting wrapped up in this award show. Maybe more later.

Slotted spoons don't hold much soup

2005-06-20T21:35:00.000-07:00

well...we were going to go swimming today, but the pool was closed for cleaning. Hunter was so sad. We all got in our swim gear and walked out to the pool, and Hunter was in his little life jacket, and you could just see the hope escaping from his person. It was almost like he deflated. It was cute, but you didn't want to laugh because he might cry...

we opted to go to Granny's and work on some of the laundry that's piles up into small mountians in the bedroom floor. We're trying to get the apartment all ready to move into the bigger apartment. We're looking into a two bedroom town house that has a washer and dryer. that would make the laundry so much easier to keep up...it's such a hassle to load basket after basket into the car (with the car seat, and the toolboxes, and all the other crap I have in the car) haul it all to Granny's spend ALL DAY over there, then load it all back up and put it all away. By the time I get it home I'm so tired of messing with it, it just sits there...

we just got back from Granny's. I'm going back over there tomorrow to work on laundry some more. I'm also going to monogram my towels that we got when we got married. and do some other work for my grandma...maybe earn a little extra $$

Cody talked to his mom about letting the older three come visit us, and go to camp, and she said ok, as long was we return the one that we borrowed first. The child lending library has strict rules.... ;)I thought it was a funny mental picture, my mother in law with a stamp, behind a counter saying, "this one's due back in three weeks, if he's not, I'll have to charge a late fee to your accouunt" and above her is the "Kitty's Child Lending Library" sign. if you knew her it would be even funnier because she's not the librarian type. :)

I think I'll sign off for now, C-bear is having man troubles again...if you're curious, ask her, I don't spread business around that isn't mine.

I'm out

2005-06-20T11:52:00.000-07:00

I've been staring at this blank page for almost an hour. I just watched one of Judy Garland's first movies called "Little Nellie Kelly" it was very cute. Now I'm watching a Doris Day/Rock Hudson flick called "Send Me No Flowers" it's about a Husband--Geroge (Rock Hudson)who is a hypocondriac, overhears his doctor talking about someone else, saying that he has only a few weeks to live, and starts interviewing new husbands for his wife Judy (Doris Day). It's really funny.

I took some NyQuil last night, slept until 11:00 today...it felt good to sleep. I've been so uptight with the fight with my dad, and all that stress, so it's been crazy. but I'm feeling a lot better now.

I'm about to get a shower. and decide what to make for dinner. I'm open to suggestions.

RedHawks baseball

2005-06-19T21:15:00.000-07:00

Today was full of fun and adventure.

I got up and went to church (since I'm in the band I get to be there an hour early) and Hunter and Cody came in time for Sunday school. We got through church and Hunter was SO good and he looked SO cute in his khaki shorts and blue and white striped polo shirt. I was so proud.

then we came home and I iced the cake, which fell apart, and grabbed the pea salad from the fridge, and we headed out to Granny's where everyone was gathering for the father's day shin dig, which I went to feeling stoned, because I had just taken some dayquill...I know they say it doens't make you drowsey, but what they didn't say was you would be STONED....

so we go and eat, and as I'm coming down off my buzz I start to get sleepy. I hadn't talked to my dad much. I did cut and take him a piece of the cake that fell apart.
my dad isn't a man of many words, so when he speaks, it counts. As I was putting my shoes on and getting hunter out to the car to go home and take a nap he took me aside, and I'm thinking "great, yet another lecture on how I've fucked up my life" but he only kept me a second and sad "I'm not mad at you, you're still my girl" gave me a hug and went back to watching the Nascar race. So, I guess we've made up.

We came home and put Hunter down for a nap in the living room, Cody and I put on Star Wars V the Empire Strikes Back, and I fell asleep. I didn't sleep very long and I woke up grumpy. Of course, I had been dreaming of star wars...don't ask why...but I was dreaming of star wars VI return of the Jedi, and i was confused to see episode V playing...I only got about an hour of sleep in...but every little bit helps.

The pastor of our church works for the Daily Oklahoman (The Okc newspaper) and got press box seats for a good number of people in the church to go see the OKC Redhawks (the triple A baseball team) Hunter had never been to a baseball game before and had a great time playing with the other kids that went. I will try and post some of the pictures that were taken of him and Rowdy Redhawk, the team mascot, who came to visit our suite.

Over all, it was a very good day. Everything was a lot better after my dad said those 9 little words. I still wish he wasn't dissappointed to begin with...but that's the perfectionaist actor in me.

Froggie, I hope you are doing well. I'm sorry that you're having troubles.

C-Bear...is there an end to the moratorium in sight? how is the kareoke scene?

It's 11:30 now, so I best shove off...I'm going to take some NyQuill...which reminds me of a Dennis Leary sketch...

big N little y GIANT FUCKING Q, nyquill nyquill nyquill we love you you GIANT FUCKING Q. :)

'night ya'll

busy me

2005-06-18T20:26:00.000-07:00

today was busy but fun. Hunter and I got up and went to Granny's, and kinda hung out.

I hung out with Lori and her boy Matt, I brought them to the apartment so I could pick up my check book, then we went to Sonic, then to Audio Midwest (where Cody works) so matt could some stuff...then back to Granny's.

then Lori, Hunter, Matt, Mom, and I went to wal-mart, then to Target, then we came back to the apartment to go swimming. We swam and swam.

Hunter had never been in a swimming pool before, so he was extra excited. We bough him some Finding Nemo trunks, and a cool Scooby Doo life jacket. He had SO much fun.
We decided that he's part Fish.

we got done swimming, then went BACK to Granny's and then went to our buddy John's house to eat. then swung by wal-mart and got home a little while ago. I'm making Pea Salad and chocolate cake for our fathers day shin dig tomorrow. I'm going becuase it's expected, not becuase dad and I made up.

anyway...I think my cake is done, so I'm going to go.

more tomorrow

when it rains it pours

2005-06-16T22:40:00.000-07:00

I just got home. I'm all wet. I mean ALL wet. We went to the Looney Bin and had a great time. The first comic wasn't that great but the second guy, Steve McGru (I think that's how you spell it) was HIL-FREAKING-ARIOUS. I laughed until I cried, then the girls and I went to IHOP. That's what we do, we go out, then go to IHOP to discuss what we did, whether we liked it or not, and laugh about other stuff not pertaining to what we just did. So, we're sitting in IHOP, laughing it up having a grand old time when we notice it starts to rain....then the power goes out. Then comes back on, and we all breathe a sigh of "ah, the power's back on" then it goes out again and we decide that it's time to leave.

Just for the record, we always try to dress up for Ladies Night. It makes us feel good. So Kacey and Amanda are both in skirts, and Ashlee and I are in jeans, but we're all wearing nice shoes and shirts (mine was dry clean only...now it looks like it would fit a poodle...) so we run out to Kacey's two door honda civic....do the math, TINY two door car, four not so tiny people...we got SOAKED. We settle in for the long drive home, see the Looney Bin isn't that close MWC, infact, it's on the other side of OKC, so it's not a quick jot down the road, top that off with we can't see the road because it's raining too hard...it took quite a long time. Then, Ashlee, who's sitting in the back seat with me, says she's really got to go to the bathroom, really bad, so we're trying to hurry, but we can't see, so finally, we get to Kacey's house and Ashlee and Amanda go in to go pee, then they pile BACK in the car, re soaked, for the drive to Amanda's... which is like three second from Kacey's...so we get there, and Ashlee who was now in the front seat (because Amanda got to the car first) gets out rund to her truck and leaves, she leaves the door open and the seat up...so we can't get out... we're trying to get out, but we're laughing so hard that we're not really getting anything done...

We finally get out...and (i did mention in a previous post that I had lost my keys...well...still don't have them...) I run to my car, hoping just to get in and get home...only the key (that's not on a key ring) gets stuck in the door, and I'm getting wetter and wetter by the second...I finally get in, and the ride home that should have taken me about three minutes, took about 15. And to top it all off, since I didn't have my keys, I didn't have my house keys, and Cody had already gone to bed and gone to sleep, so I'm standing outside my apartment, in the rain, with the shrinking shirt, banging on the door...If it hadn't have been me out there, I would have laughed.

I get in and change clothes, comb my hair, and sit to blog to wind down...and that pretty much brings you up to speed...and it's a good thing too, becuase now, I'm tired, and am going to drag my cold, wet, tired self to bed.

'night.

2005-06-16T17:42:00.000-07:00

Hey all...

Kacey and Amanda to the rescue. Just when I thought I was about to go crazy, my two best friends in OK call me up and say they're going to kidnap me and we're going to the comedy club for Ladies Night. I jumped at the chance. I'm just waiting on the call to say that they're ready to leave.

I slept late today, about 10:00, then I created the new blog, jumped into the shower, woke Hunter up, then we started out to my granda's...well...we almost started. I lost my keys. I still can't find them. Luckily, Cody came and brought me my spare, and luckily I found the Drivers Lisence I had lost before...so no harm done. The stupid keys are in the house somewhere...

so, we went to Granny's, put in some laundry, then Granny took us to Wal-Mart. We got lots of cool stuff. Then went back to Granny's to finish the laundry, came home, and worked on my model ship. Things we going great until I spilled red paint all over my clothes, and the table. I got all that cleaned up when Cody got home...almost an hour late. But he's home now. On his computer... he did bring me flowers though. Because of last night, and all the drama with my dad.

now I'm watching The Harvey Girls. Judy Garland, and a very young Angela Lansbury. Instead of singing herself, she's got a voice over...I think it's hil-freaking-arious. I'm waiting on Kacey to call, so I can head over to the meeting place.

Cody bought me a blender, finally. I had been wanting one of a while now. not that it's all that important, but i was excited. I got a new deep frier too. A bigger one, that has a thermometer on it, so I don't have to guess the temp anymore.

I just sprayed Hunter with the water bottle...he thinks it's funny. It is the little things in life.

I should get going now. I'm going to head out.

the first of many...

2005-06-16T08:08:00.000-07:00

Sorry for the inconvienince everyone...I know this was NOT the happiest thing I've ever done...but in a way, there's a new freedom in it.

I sent my dad a link to my blog thinking he would just read the one post...but no, he had to go way back before Cody and I got married, and read about "rick"...about how we were a thing before Cody and I even met, then after he found out that I was getting married and tried to talk me out of it...there's just some things that dad's don't need to know. I don't know everything about him...you know? But I guess it's my own fault for giving him the link. so...I decided that if he was going to read EVERYTHING, and hold it against me, I would just keep him from reading altogether. Needless to say, this golden girl lost more than a little luster over this issue. If he didn't like me being with "rick" he would have hated that other big mistake I made involving the abusive a-hole from Linc.... You can't judge a person by the mistakes they've made. If you're going to go all righteous and judge me, judge me by the lessons learned from said mistakes.

Anyway...that's why I decided to start over. Start a new....and I'll have to be very careful about what I put in this one...you never know who's reading and who will bust your chops for what you post.

Kacey and Clint are back from thier honeymoon. She called me yesterday. I was only too glad to hear from her. I missed her something aweful. I'm glad that they went on a long honeymoon...that's important, and a luxury Cody and I couldn't afford. But there would be little things that would make me think "oh, I should call Kacey" or " I should invite Kacey and Clint over" then I would remind myself "ugh, they're not here, they're half way around the world" I'm glad they had a good itme, but I'm glad they are back.

My parents are coming into town tonight, so the fact that my dad called me up last night and let me have what for (altohough I should point out that I no longer live in his house, therefore, should not have to submit to his authority...so why he thinks he can lecture me about the mistakes I've made is beyond me) will make this weekend a wee bit awkward. But we will get through it somehow. I guess Idon't HAVE to make ourselves availible.

I guess now would be as good a time as any to tell you all that we lost the baby last night.

We went to tulsa yesterday to help my sister and Matt with a few things, and I picked up something that was a lot heavier than I thought. I felt it pull, but I did nothing. The last night, after my dad called and lambasted me, I got into the shower, and felt it pass.

I'm not as broken up about it as I thought I would be. I wanted the baby, but this was my longest prenancy to date...so that give me hope.

We went and saw Batman Begins on Tuesday. It was really dark, but really good. It had the Comic Book feel to it. I was impressed. I've always like Christian Bale though. He's been good in anything I've seen him in. He's very versitile too. He's done everything from Chick Flicks (little women) to muiscals (newsies) to action (equalibrium, and batman) he's good.

anyway, I'm going to get a shower, and get around so we can do some laundry today.